


Hearts Can’t Be Hacked… I’m Screwed

by Spaceship0Mile



Series: The Mechanics to Your Heart [3]
Category: NCT (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - High School, Angst, Bullying, Denial of Feelings, Fluff, Friends to Lovers, Hacker Jisung, Loneliness, M/M, Multi, Other, Pining
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-10-25
Updated: 2019-01-17
Packaged: 2019-08-07 10:16:34
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 6
Words: 26,433
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16406528
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Spaceship0Mile/pseuds/Spaceship0Mile
Summary: Jisung started hacking at the ripe age of six years old. No piece of information was unattainable to him.The one person he promised never to hack was Chenle, his best friend and partner in crime (literally).When Chenle started acting strangely, Jisung felt their friendship begin to fall apart.And the worst part was that there wasn't anything he could do about it.





	1. Prelude

**Author's Note:**

> This is only the prelude, which is a flashback to give some backstory, the actual story will start from chapter 2

            Jisung started hacking at the ripe age of 6 years old. At first, it was little things like getting his parents’ credit card details or reading their private text messages and listening to their private phone calls. Most of what he snooped in on was not relevant to him and his brother. But he hacked their phones and bank accounts because he wanted to know why his parents kept yelling at each other into the middle of the night or why most mornings he woke up to a door slamming in anger. Even though he managed to read their texts and listen to their calls, he still couldn’t understand what exactly it was they were fighting about. He didn’t have to worry for long, though, because a few years later, they got a divorce and his father moved out of the house.

Another thing he liked to do was alter little details in the setting of whatever video game he found his older brother playing. He later on learned how to change the game itself, creating new storylines and adding monsters and heroes that he’d made up from scratch. Donghyuck noticed it the very first time it happened, even though all Jisung had done was to add a few gray fish to a shimmering pond near one of the smaller mountains. Jisung remembered how giddy and nervous he’d felt. It was similar to the feeling of being caught in a game of hide and seek, except instead of losing, he felt like he’d won.

“How’d you do it?” 8-year-old Donghyuck had asked him with his arms squared as he looked down his nose at Jisung. Despite his stance, the way Donghyuck asked it wasn’t accusatory or jealous; his voice was laced with barely reigned curiosity and admiration.

Jisung had smiled in a deliberately secretive manner, “I didn’t think you’d even notice.” He told his brother, only half-aware of how patronizing he sounded.

“You have to be careful,” Donghyuck had advised solemnly. “If you don’t want to change schools, you have to keep it a secret, like me.”     

Jisung ignored the part about keeping it a secret, he was more curious about his brother. He asked, “What do you mean like you?”

“I’m a genius too.” Donghyuck had admitted.

Jisung laughed before realizing that his brother wasn’t joking, “Oh, sorry. I thought you were kidding.”

Donghyuck looked about ready to smack him and Jisung prepared to run, heart racing in excitement for the upcoming chase, but the attack never came, which was a bit disappointing at 6 years old, “As I was saying, if the adults notice, they’ll take you to a different school, with other super smart kids, which isn’t bad, really. But I like going to a normal school with normal kids. It’s up to you what you want to do. Just think about it carefully first.” Jisung’s concern must have shown because Donghyuck punched his arm lightly, “Look, it’s a good thing. Just don’t let your life be taken from you. Make sure that whatever happens is your choice, not theirs. And I’ll always be here to help you, so you’re not alone in this, okay?”

“Okay,” Jisung said gratefully. The moment was too sweet, it made him feel awkward so he said, “You call yourself a genius, but what is it that you can do?”

“I’m smart.” Donghyuck said.

“That’s it?” Jisung then proceeded to tell him about his own hacking abilities. When he mentioned the part about hacking into their mother’s and Jisung’s father’s bank accounts, Donghyuck looked tempted for a moment, then shook his head, expression sobering instantly.

“Look up the definition of the word genius,” Donghyuck said. “I fit the description.”

“The boring part of it.” Jisung deadpanned. This time, Donghyuck did attack and Jisung was ready to dodge him and run. They broke their mother’s favorite vase chasing each other that day and with their combined genius, they blamed it on the pet dog.

They did not have a dog.


	2. Day One (Part 1)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Part one of the first day of school

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This was supposed to be a one-shot but as I planned it I decided that it needed to be longer so I will be updating short chapters rather than a single long one
> 
> Anyway here is the first chapter!

Jisung liked to think of his room as a fortress. About five months ago he would have called it impregnable, however, after he’d accidentally exposed his brother’s secret to their mother in this very room, he decided to force his confidence down a notch. So now Jisung still thought of his room as a fortress, but he was always on the lookout for enemies trying to break through his defenses. It happened once, he thought, so what was to stop it from happening again?

He pushed the sour memory down. Everything had worked out for the best after all. Haechan and Mark were happy together and Jisung’s mother was back to normal, which meant she was back to acting like she didn’t have children. Besides, the most important part of his room was secure. He’d made sure that both his computer and his laptop were inaccessible to anyone other than himself. For example, if someone, say his mother, tried to turn his computer on, all she’d find would be a bunch of memes, video games (that he hadn’t created himself), and some very badly written essays for school.

After his mother found out that his brother was a genius, she naturally began to suspect him too. This meant he had to work extra hard at pretending to be mediocre at best. The few weeks after she’d found out were the most difficult. She would pop into his room more than twice a day without knocking. After that he developed a habit of locking the door; something he’d never had to do before. He was always better than Haechan at hiding his intelligence, so she had no way of finding out through his teachers. Most students thought of him as the ‘weird kid’ and either ignored him or occasionally pushed him around, so she wouldn’t find out through the student body either.

Another thing he did not have in common with his brother, which helped him, was his lack of social skills. Most of the people he knew, he knew because of his brother. The one’s he knew without his brother having introduced him to were a few of his friends from dance, like Taeyong and Sicheng. But he could hardly call them his friends as they were college students and he rarely spent time with them outside of the studio.

Jisung knew that he had only ever made one friend, and that was Chenle. He couldn’t wait to see him at school later, and even better, at dance practice afterwards.

Chenle had been away on vacation with his family in Europe all summer. The last time he’d seen him, exactly two months ago, he’d made Jisung promise he’d ‘keep fighting the good fight,’ which Jisung had tried to do, but without Chenle it just didn’t feel right. He’d done it anyway, making sure to help at least one person a day. He was sure that Chenle texting him or video calling him whenever he could was a big part of why he did it. The last thing Jisung wanted to do was to disappoint him.

This was their secret; his and Chenle’s alone. Not even Haechan knew about it.

Chenle referred to Jisung as a hero and he referred to himself as Jisung’s sidekick. But in reality, Jisung was a vigilante at best. And he wouldn’t have thought to do any of it had it not been for Chenle. So if one of them was a hero, it was Chenle, not him.

The most important difference between Jisung and Haechan was the fact that unlike Haechan, if Jisung were to be discovered, he wouldn’t simply skip a few grades. Jisung’s exposure would have colossal consequences. This was why the fewer people who knew, the better.

By hacking into security feeds and interfering with police work (even if it was just to help them locate and catch criminals) Jisung had committed various cyber crimes, which meant he would end up in juvie were he ever to be caught.

But even if Jisung’s room was a fortress that could be infiltrated, there was not a doubt in his mind that his computer was, in fact, impenetrable. No one could ever breach the shields he’d built up.

Jisung was ready for the first day of school, but instead of leaving, he threw himself onto his bed. His hoodie felt lumpy where it was suffocated between his shoulder blades and his unmade comforter. His hair was still slightly wet from the shower and an above average, like Chenle liked to remind him, head-sized spot of moisture was slowly expanding on the comforter under his head. His knees were bent at the edge of the bed and his feet were planted on the ground.

His phone lay silently on one side of his head, Chenle hadn’t texted him again since he’d arrived last night and told him to meet him by the lockers near Haechan’s favorite bathroom. Jisung hadn’t questioned why Chenle knew Haechan’s bathroom of choice, especially since the last time Haechan had been in the same school as Chenle was about two years ago; he was used to his best friend having all sorts of useless information in his own, as Chenle also liked to mention, above normal sized head.

On the other side of Jisung’s head was the radio scanner. He and Chenle both knew all the police, fire, and emergency stations’ frequencies by heart, the same went for all their different codes.

On the last night they’d spent together, before Chenle left to pack for his trip, Chenle had clutched the scanner close to his ears, waiting for any crimes that might be happening around the corner. There wasn’t anything going on that night, at least not anything that Jisung could help with from the safety of his room. So they’d spent the rest of their time together playing Jisung’s latest open world video game.

He’d designed it so that it read the player’s gaming patterns and evolved accordingly to his or her personal strengths and weaknesses. The only people who had ever played it were Haechan, Chenle and himself. After spending more time with Haechan’s college friends over the summer, he’d briefly thought about letting them play it, but he wasn’t sure they were trustworthy. But he did appreciate how they treated him as an equal and knew better than to underestimate his abilities like most people. Jisung was, however, more likely to let Renjun, Jeno, and Jaemin try it. But first, he wanted to finish developing a program that would study their behavioral patterns and therefore allow him to determine who to trust.

A shiver went down his spine at the thought of how much the game would expand if he were to let more people try it… Or better yet, if he were to ever release it to the public. He shook his head, as though to erase the idea.

“It would be glorious.” He allowed himself to whisper before moving on from the thought.

He turned to his side to stare at the radio scanner. Haechan had once asked Jisung why he opted to use a radio scanner when he could tap into whatever frequencies he wanted using his laptop or phone. He and Chenle had been outraged and offended as they’d simultaneously drawled, “Because it’s cooler!” causing Haechan to raise his arms in surrender and leave the room.

But right now Jisung was using the scanner to play his favorite radio station. One pop song played after the other. His toes and fingers danced involuntarily to the beat while he bobbed his head. He got up and walked the one and a half steps to his dresser, doing a spin along the way.

A pair of specs stared up at him from where they sat on the polished wood. He’d bought them last week, but hadn’t tried them on yet. They were clear glass, since Jisung had perfect vision. But he’d bought them ironically, laughing to himself about how they made him look smart.

After a minute of hesitation, he put them on and blinked at his reflection in the mirror. Then, as the song picked up speed, he broke into dance and finished it off with another spin. He looked good, he thought. The dark blue of his oversized hoodie complemented his dark hair. He briefly wondered if Chenle would agree. He shook his head at the thought, a sound of denial leaving his mouth.

“Stupid.” He called his reflection. Then he paused, looking into his reflected eyes mirthfully, and doubled over with laughter.

When he couldn’t delay the inevitable any longer, he wringed his hands, pulled his hoodie up over his eyes, plugged his earphones in, and walked to school.

The sky was overcast, a soft drizzle of rain fell onto the tip of his nose and he ducked further into his hoodie. It was still early and the sidewalk was completely deserted apart from a few pigeons. One of them seemed to be following him and he eyed it suspiciously from the corners of his eyes. But it soon found a crumb and started picking at it. His hands fisted deeper into his hoodie’s pocket and he walked faster.

Chenle wasn’t by the lockers where they’d promised to meet last night. Jisung cocked his head in confusion. He pulled his phone out of his back pocket to check if Chenle had sent him a text about relocating their designated meeting point. The only text he’d gotten that morning was from his brother, wishing him a good first day. He was about to text Chenle when he felt the air get knocked out of his lungs. His body lurched forward as someone pushed him from behind.

His grip on his phone instinctively loosened and it zoomed out of his hand and skittered across the hall. He was on his hands and knees staring at his phone a few meters away. A couple of students stepped on it and he got up without bothering to see who it was that pushed him to make his way to his phone.

He was yanked harshly back by his arm. His shoulder strained from the pull as he was forcefully dragged backward, away from his phone, and manhandled to turn around. He stared daggers at the student who’d pushed him. All he could think to do was to run and grab his phone. He’d be fine as long as he had his phone with him, he thought. But it was out of his reach and the guy was still holding his arm in a vice-like grip.

“What’s this?” The guy sneered and pulled Jisung’s hoodie off of his head.

Jisung didn’t know what the guy was referring to, so he spat, “What’s what, asshole?”

He didn’t think he’d ever seen him before, but he doubted he would recognize most of the students; Jisung rarely looked up in the halls.

The guy laughed harder, his hand coming up to Jisung’s face. Jisung only remembered that he had the specs on when the guy pulled them off his nose. He shut his eyes momentarily, taking in calming breaths.

“What do you want?” He asked the guy levelly.

Jisung could see three familiar figures rushing towards them. He relaxed, smirking a little, which pissed the guy off. He threw Jisung’s specs on the floor. Jisung heard the glass shatter and his anger came back full swing. Before he could react, the guy was yanked back. Jaemin had him in a headlock and the guy choked, both from the force and from surprise. Jeno was in his face while Jaemin held him.

Renjun was cupping Jisung’s face, checking for any signs that he was hurt.

“Are you okay?” Jaemin called.

“I’m fine,” Jisung said, shrugging out of Renjun’s hold and retrieving his ruined specs. “Don’t let him go before you get me his name.” He told Jaemin and Jeno.

The guy started speaking, “What are you going to—” Jaemin must have cut off his airway because he couldn’t seem to finish his question.

“Say you’re sorry!” Jaemin demanded. Jisung thought it was nice of him, but unnecessary. He would make sure the guy was sorry after he got his name. He heard Jeno whisper, “Jaemin, he can’t say anything you’re kind of killing him.”

“Oh.” Jaemin loosened his grip and the guy gulped whatever air his lungs could take in. Jisung smiled a little despite himself.

“Jisung and I will go get a teacher.” Renjun droned; pulling Jisung along with him. He told him about how Jaemin wouldn’t stop talking about how much he missed him over the summer break. Jisung reminded him that they’ve been seeing each other twice a week every week at dance, which Renjun ignored. A strong sweet scent hit Jisung’s nose and he sniffed, trying to locate its source.

“You smell like burnt candy.” Jisung informed Renjun as he picked up his phone. The screen, thankfully, hadn’t cracked.

Renjun visibly cringed, “Still?”

“Why do you smell like burnt candy?”

Renjun didn’t answer, instead he asked, “Where’s Chenle?”

“I don’t know, I was looking for him when that guy decided to take his frustration at his lack of brain cells out on me.”

Jisung was glad Chenle hadn’t been there this time. The last time he’d gotten pushed around that way, Chenle had tried to defend him and ended up getting hurt worse than he had. Of course they’d taken their revenge that very night, but the humiliation always lingered.

Jisung could feel bitterness rise in him. It was always easier to see the bright side of things when Chenle was around. _Where the hell was he?_

They saw one of their teachers and took him with them to where Jaemin was still choking the life out of the bully. It took them a few minutes to explain that Jaemin and Jeno were defending Jisung rather than killing a student.

When the teacher left with the asshole, Jisung sniffed again, “Why do you all smell like burnt candy?” He asked.

“Still?” Jaemin asked and Jeno pouted, sniffling.

Jisung rolled his eyes, he could find out for himself if they didn’t want to tell him. “See you at dance later?” He said.

“Yup.” Jeno smiled.

Jaemin was pinching both Jisung’s cheeks hard enough to hurt but he managed to squirm away, “We’ll see you before that, remember? We have second period together!”

“Right,” Jisung grimaced. “I’m going to class.” He waved goodbye and grabbed a notebook from his locker.

That was when he noticed Alice. He ran after her to ask her about Chenle, but when she saw him he stopped dead in his tracks. Her eyes were bloodshot and her nose was pink. Her face twisted in distaste as she took him in. His mouth was halfway open, the words seemingly stuck.

“What do you want?” She asked, her tone venomous.

“I—” Jisung started, her attitude was confusing. “Have you seen Chenle?”

At that, she laughed. It was an ugly sound. Jisung spoke again, “Well, where is he?”

“Find him yourself.” She spat. And with that she turned her back and left Jisung alone in the hall.

Jisung didn’t need to take notes, but having a blank page in front of him and a pen in his hand made the monotony of his lessons easier to handle. He had taught himself everything the public school system had to teach him years ago and then he’d moved on to learning things that were actually worth learning.

He held his phone under the desk and texted Chenle:

Where are you?

[sent 8:00 am]

He hated that he couldn’t just find out by himself, like he’d found out that Jaemin, Jeno, and Renjun had been practicing a cake recipe they wanted to make for Mark’s acceptance to college late surprise party next week by hacking into Jaemin’s text messages. They hadn’t been able to throw the party earlier because Mark had gone back to Canada the first month of summer break, then Renjun had to go to China for a couple of weeks, and Jaemin and Jeno disappeared for a week and nobody knew where they were.

But Jisung knew, of course, however, he didn’t tell anyone other than Chenle, because he didn’t feel like receiving a lecture about privacy from Haechan again. They’d spent a week at Jaemin’s grandparents’ beach house. They’d both lied to their parents about being alone together there and made up lame excuses to their friends.

But Jisung couldn’t find out where Chenle was right now, because they’d made a pact: Jisung was not allowed to hack Chenle. _Ever_. And that was a promise Jisung had always and would always keep.

He was a mixture of bored and worried. The teacher was talking nonstop, and Jisung was grateful for his ability to hear selectively if he put his mind to it.

He decided to check if Yuta changed his contact name in his phone again to pass the time. This has been happening for over a year. Every other friend of Haechan’s had given up trying to fight Jisung’s superiority except for Yuta.

The first five times Jisung had changed his contact name from Jisung Park to God Jisung on Yuta’s phone, Yuta would notice weeks after the fact and change it. But every time after that seemed like Yuta had made it a habit to check his contact list daily and change Jisung’s name back to what he wanted.

This time, though, when he checked, the name was Dancing Jisung instead of Jisung Park. His thumb moved to delete it, but he stopped half way through and kept it as it was, the corners of his mouth lifting into a small smile.

After class, he stayed in place as the students piled out. His mood wasn’t great given the fact that school had started up again, but it had also dropped considerably regardless as he waited for a text back from Chenle.

It didn’t come.

Jisung hacked back into Yuta’s phone and changed his contact name to God Jisung.

Jisung was staring at the classroom door, imagining the students that would begin to pile into it in a few minutes for the next lesson. He would have to get up then. However, for now he could sit here and think about nothing and everything at once.

That was when he saw one of the largest heads he’d ever come across pop up through the square door window. Jisung felt a rush. Chenle was frowning until the moment he spotted Jisung at his desk, then his frown transformed into a gigantic toothy grin and he opened the door.

Jisung couldn’t help the small smile that only spread wider as he embraced his friend.

Chenle was still grinning as they took each other in. Jisung didn’t know if it was an effect of the black sweater his friend was wearing, but his skin looked a lot paler than Jisung remembered it, something he did not think possible.

“You got taller.” Chenle noted.

“You got paler.” Jisung countered.

Chenle’s smile didn’t drop, “Your head is still huge.”

“Thanks, so is yours.” They laughed then settled into a silent moment. Excitement swam through Jisung’s body, he repeatedly shifted his weight to his left leg then his right.

“Where were you?” Jisung asked as light-heartedly as he could.

“I had to do something,” Chenle said. His voice a little strange in the way it sometimes got when they video chatted over the summer. Jisung could never quite pinpoint what the shifts in Chenle’s mood indicated. He didn’t have enough information and most of the time, he was too afraid to ask. “and I couldn’t text you because my phone’s dead.”

“Oh,” Jisung said. “What did you have to do?”

“Nothing,” Chenle smiled. The way he did it made Jisung feel like a door had been slammed in his face. The worst part was that he had the key, but he wasn’t allowed to use it. “Come on, we have to hurry to make it to the elective class Jaemin made us sign up for.”

“Problems and Solutions,” Jisung said, trying to cling to something that might steer the conversation back to normal. “Sounds like a headache.”

“Are you kidding? All five of us in the same class? It’s going to be amazing.” Chenle corrected.

Jisung’s dark mood had already improved considerably, and as they ran to the classroom, which was located in the other building, he was laughing heartily.

They slowed to a stop when they were near their classroom. Chenle looked at his watch then back at Jisung, his mouth twisted as though he’d eaten something sour.

“We’re seven minutes late…” He said, like it mattered.

Jisung shrugged, moving to open the door.

“You’re late!” The teacher said, smiling excitedly, as though the sentence was one he’d dreamt of saying.

Jisung and Chenle gave each other a look. Chenle looked as bewildered as Jisung felt.

“Take a seat, take a seat!” The teacher said.

He looked like he’d recently graduated university and students had yet to break his spirit, “We have our very first problem,” he declared. “These two students were late to class, what would be an appropriate solution for this issue?” He addressed the class.

Jisung surveyed the classroom while the teacher spoke. Jaemin and Renjun were sitting next to each other in the second row, while Jeno sat behind Jaemin. He looked about ready to doze off as he waved at Chenle. Jaemin smiled at Jisung and winked.

Jisung and Chenle decided to sit at the back of the classroom at the same time; this was communicated by a subtle nod of Chenle’s head towards the teacher and a tight-lipped smile from Jisung.

After they’d sat, Jisung in the very middle row, while Chenle was in the row on Jisung’s right side, the teacher spoke again, “Any solutions to the issue of tardiness?”

The class was completely silent, but then Chenle spoke up, surprising Jisung, “We won’t be late again.” He promised.

Jisung could see Chenle take his phone slightly out of his pocket while he kept eye contact with the teacher, his eyes smiling. He pressed the power button and the screen came to life. Jisung cocked his head and looked at the teacher instead.

The teacher beamed, “That’s a good solution.” He said.

Jisung sighed, questioning his sanity for allowing himself to be pressured into taking this class. Even though he knew he had done it under duress; Jaemin had smothered him with kisses and threatened to make a habit out of it if Jisung did not agree to sign up for the class.

Jisung wasn’t strong enough to fight the other boy off and Chenle was no help as he laughed at Jisung’s suffering from the side while he got kissed to near-death. A betrayal he would not soon forget.

Jisung signed up and lived a Jaemin-kiss-free life from that moment onwards.

“Let’s move on to the next problem,” The teacher said, a bit louder than necessary.

Jisung could have sworn he heard Renjun whisper, “That was a solution?”

“You are our future,” The teacher informed them. “So, how do you, our future, suggest we maintain peace between countries?”

“What the fuck?” Jisung heard Renjun whisper angrily again.

“I suggest,” Jaemin spoke over Renjun. “That people shut up.”

The teacher’s eyes widened.

Chenle snorted.

Jisung smiled.

“Allow me to explain,” Jaemin stood. “Peace between countries starts with peace between people. And I firmly believe that peace between people could be accomplished if people spoke less often. For example, say I was feeling uncomfortable or in some sort of pain, instead of complaining about it, if I considered the people who were suffering worse than me, I would shut up and that would help promote peace, as there would be less arguments and therefore problems in the world. Thank you” With that he sat.

“What the fuck?” Renjun said aloud this time, the teacher gave him a warning look. Chenle was shaking with suppressed laughter next to Jisung.

Jisung’s selective hearing always failed him when it came to his friends.

Renjun stood up and addressed Jaemin, “Voicing your discomfort might result in someone giving you a helping hand instead of it being seen as an inconsiderate act. If you don’t say anything, wouldn’t your discomfort remain? Invisible but ever-present? And even if others had it worse than you, you wouldn’t be helping them by remaining silent anyway.”

“There are other ways to deal with discomfort,” Jaemin said, standing up again, facing the teacher instead of Renjun. “Like, say my discomfort came from hunger, and I could just go and eat something instead of whining when there are people who are starving.”

The teacher was paying close attention as though their argument was valid and not at all the dumbest and most useless discussion Jisung had ever heard, and Jisung had once heard his brother argue that Mark was ‘the only person in the world’.

“But if you ate alone and didn’t tell anyone else, wouldn’t _that_ be inconsiderate to the people around you who may also have been hungry? Let alone people who can hardly afford to eat…”

Jeno was audibly snoring, but the teacher didn’t seem to notice.

“I could suggest that we eat together to those people instead of complaining about it.”

“Which means that you still spoke, thus proving your suggestion that silence equates peace invalid.” Renjun said calmly.

“Oh my god, so maybe it wasn’t the best example, why are you ruining my life?” Jaemin asked and the classroom exploded in laughter.

“See this is the sort of discussion we’ll be having in this class to train you to navigate your way through a debate…” The teacher said.

“That was a mess, I feel like the entire classroom’s IQs dropped from that debate, if you could even call it that. I wouldn’t be surprised if someone wanted to file a lawsuit.” A random student said.

Jisung watched Chenle, who was leaning forward with his elbows braced against his desk, his body seemed to thrum with excitement.

“So you agree with Jaemin?” Chenle said to the student.

“What?” the student stuttered. “No, How?”

“You think this whole thing and its negative effects could have been avoided if Jaemin hadn’t participated.”

“I… suppose.” She said.

“EVERYONE SHUT UP,” Chenle called, standing up and raising his arms. “DON’T SAY ANYTHING!”

Jaemin let out a whoop.

Jeno sat up with a too loud “What’s happening?” Jisung caught a glimpse of his face when he turned around to look at Chenle. His cheeks were tinted pink and a trail of drool escaped the edge of his lips.

Renjun came over to high-five Chenle before going back to his desk.

The class erupted into chaos as everyone started to have side-discussions.

Jisung took advantage of the teacher’s distress as he tried to regain control over the students. He nudged Chenle, showing him a live stream of their favorite criminal’s apartment on his phone.

Chenle’s eyes widened as he pulled his chair closer until he sat in-between the two middle rows without a desk. He leaned close enough so that he was shoulder to shoulder with Jisung. Jisung’s gaze inadvertently moved to the phone in Chenle’s pocket before snapping himself out of it.

The criminal, whom they liked to call Small Head, was planning a heist with a couple of accomplices. Jisung set an alarm to alert the police at an appropriate time. He would remotely trigger the bank’s security alarm when the time came, making sure that the criminals would be caught when they were close to the bank and with damning evidence in their possession: masks, guns, maps, etc… but before they harmed anyone.

The last time Jisung had tried to do this, he had miscalculated, triggering the alarm when he saw the criminal preparing to leave his flat, which resulted in the police showing up long before the criminal, which served to warn the criminal who had caught a whiff of the police’s presence and ran, which prevented any crime from taking place and therefore the criminal from being arrested.

In Jisung’s defense, he had been distracted that day; he and Chenle had been trying to help Mark win Haechan’s heart at the time and he was struggling with some strange feelings of his own.

Chenle’s eyes glowed as he watched the criminals fuss over their blueprints of the bank’s vault.

“Let’s watch him get arrested at your place after dance?” Chenle suggested.

Jisung nodded enthusiastically.

The teacher was sweating when Jisung looked up again. Jeno had apparently started another discussion.

“Why should cats have to carry the stigma of being cold-hearted based on an unfair comparison?” Jeno said passionately.

Jaemin started a slow clap.

Renjun pretended to shed a few tears.

The teacher noticed Chenle sitting in the middle of the two rows.

Chenle froze for less than a second before he relaxed and stretched his arm on the back of Jisung’s chair, his demeanor screaming carefree.

The teacher sighed.

“Alright, that’s it for today. For next week, come to class with a list of problems and various solutions for them. You will be chosen randomly, so don’t come empty handed.”

“But if you do,” Chenle said, pointing at the teacher with his index finger. “We can always come up with a solution for it!”

The teacher’s eyes narrowed, it seemed they had already depleted his energy, “No,” He said. “Come prepared.”

“Oh,” Chenle smiled and bowed politely. “Sorry. Yes, of course.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> My [twt](https://twitter.com/Spaceship0Mile)
> 
> My [cc](https://curiouscat.me/Spaceship0Mile)
> 
> Comments are appreciated but no pressure uwu <3 !


	3. Day One (Part 2)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Part two of the first day of school.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here you go.

After they left the class, Renjun and Jaemin started arguing again and Jeno looked too sleepy to care as he followed them.

Jisung spoke when they had gone, “I just forwarded you a safe link to the surveillance camera feeds.”

Chenle pulled his phone out excitedly. Jisung didn’t miss the redness that crept up his neck as he realized his mistake. He raised his eyes to meet Jisung’s, the corners of his mouth dipped down as he frowned at his friend.

Jisung didn’t know why Chenle was lying to him, but he was beginning to get used to it, which he didn’t like. So he decided to confront him about it.

“What’s going on?” Jisung asked.

“It’s nothing, alright? Just drop it.” Chenle said. He said it softly, which Jisung didn’t expect.

He felt strange, like he’d felt when Chenle first told him he’d started seeing Alice last year, but not exactly. This felt more like Jisung was glitching because Chenle was behaving in unexpected ways. He could do nothing to redirect himself to a familiar path.

Jisung swallowed, “I saw Alice earlier.” He found himself saying.

“Did she talk to you?” Chenle asked too quickly.

Jisung’s eyes widened, “No. Why? Did something happen?”

“Do we have any other classes together?” Chenle asked, he suddenly seemed to be distracted by everyone in the hall except for Jisung.

Jisung knew that Chenle knew the answer. They’d talked about their schedules more than once over their calls in the summer.

“Art class, sixth period.” Jisung said.

“Right, okay, I’ll see you then.”

“What about lunch?” Jisung asked.

“I have to do something during lunch period so I’ll just see you after.”

With that Chenle left for his third class.

 

When Jisung walked into physics class, he was surprised to find Jaemin there. He decided to sit behind him to avoid getting ‘affectionately’ kicked throughout the class.

In the minute they had before the teacher arrived, Jaemin asked Jisung for his ‘genius opinion’ on the debate he’d had with Renjun in Problems and Solutions. Jisung decided not to comment and just stared at him blankly until Jaemin got tired and turned back around in his seat.

Jisung sulked throughout the class. He occasionally checked up on Small Head. He wondered if Chenle was watching the criminal on the feed as well, but since Chenle’s phone was off-limits, he didn’t check.

One class melted into the other. When it was finally lunch period, Jisung found himself sandwiched between Renjun and Jeno.

“I wanted to sit next to Jisung.” Jaemin complained from where he was sitting right across from Jisung, his cheek lifted as he pushed his fist against it and pouted.

“Write it down as one of your ‘problems’ for Problems and Solutions homework.” Jeno advised, flapping his hand as though to encourage Jaemin to do it quickly.

“Or you could just switch places with me.” Jaemin smiled sweetly.

“Can we stop talking about that class? It was a nightmare.” Renjun said.

“What are you talking about? It was great, especially since I won the debate.” Jaemin said.

“You didn’t win shit. I can’t believe I let you make me sign up for a class called Problems and Solutions.” Renjun complained.

“He could never take losing very well.” Jaemin said to Jeno as though Renjun wasn’t there with them.

“Let’s finish planning Mark’s party.” Jeno said, pulling out a small notebook and opening it to a page full of scratched out words and, Jisung saw as Jeno flipped though it, various sketches of the party they’d imagined.

Jisung turned towards Renjun, “Did you draw these?”

Renjun nodded. Jisung reached for the notebook to inspect the sketches closely. “Wow.” He said.

He was in the middle of laughing at a sketch of Renjun pushing Mark’s face into a misshapen cake when the notebook was snatched out of his grip from someone standing behind him.

He startled. _Not again._ But before he could consider how busy he would be tonight, destroying not just one bully’s, but two bullies’ lives, Jaemin yelled, “CHENLE!”

Jisung loosed a breath, relaxing, before he twisted in his seat to look up at Chenle.

“Thought you were busy?” He said.

“I’m done.” Chenle said. He wasn’t smiling but his eyes were soft as he looked at Jisung over the notebook.

Jisung stared at Chenle. The moment felt drawn out. He couldn’t help smiling as Chenle stared back. Then Chenle started to smile as well. Jisung felt his heart grow warmer.

“Um…” Jisung heard Jeno say while Jaemin cleared his throat. Chenle jumped into action, maneuvering himself up and over the table and twisting around until he was seated next to Jaemin, a wide grin on his face.

“You’re bringing a clown?” Chenle asked them, pointing to a page with a gangly looking clown and a giggling Mark pointing at it.

“It was just something we were considering.” Jeno answered.

“… Why?” Jisung asked.

“It’s Mark’s acceptance to university party!”

“Yes, university, not preschool.” Chenle said.

“I told them.” Renjun said.

“We were only considering it.” Jeno repeated.

“Actually Chenle, we were hoping you’d be the clown, we’re kind of broke.” Jaemin admitted.

A charged moment was broken by Jisung’s laughter, “It really looks like you!” Jisung said.

Chenle leaned over the table to pretend-hit him, but he joined in with the laughter.

The bell rang.

Jisung wanted to walk to art class, but Chenle seemed to be intent on running everywhere today. He grabbed Jisung’s hand and dragged him to class. Chenle set off at a sprint, while Jisung felt more like he was avoiding falling to his death than he was running.

A teacher gave them a disapproving look, but didn’t say anything as they zoomed past her. Jisung smiled at her sparingly and gave a quick wave as he sped up so as to not risk losing his arm.

They were early to class thanks to Chenle. They found Renjun in the corner of the class, hidden behind a large canvas. He poked his head up to smile at them before resuming his work. He was working on a project he had to submit to enter an art program after he graduates.

“Free period?” Chenle asked him.

“Yup. Mr. Boo said it was okay to work here so long as I kept quiet, so don’t talk to me or look at me for the next hour I don’t know you.” Renjun answered, disappearing behind the canvas again.

“How’d you get here so fast?” Jisung asked.

Renjun ignored him.

Students piled into the workroom. Chenle kept giving the back of the canvas a dirty look.

No one paid attention to Renjun who was only a pair of shoes at the bottom of a canvas at the very back of the class.

Jisung and Chenle sat at the back again, but this time they chose the booth on the far right side of the class so that they could be closer to Renjun.

Jisung was working on a paper airplane for Chenle to throw at Renjun’s head when the teacher walked in.

“The materials before you are the only things you are allowed to use in creating your first assignment of this semester.” Mr. Boo said in lieu of greeting the class. He gestured to the endless bottles of paint, cardboard boxed, colorful papers, glues, glitter vials, along with other art supplies.

“Why did we take art again?” Jisung asked Chenle, his stomach was in knots.

“Because it’s required.” Chenle answered.

Art class was the only class for which Jisung did not need to put in extra effort to fail. Especially since any and all digital work was strictly prohibited.

“The first assignment will be difficult for most of you, because it demands as much honesty from you as it demands skill.” Mr. Boo continued. Jisung’s ears perked at that. He inadvertently turned to look at Chenle, whose eyebrows were furrowed.

Jisung heard Renjun sigh appreciatively and he knew he was intrigued by the assignment too.

“You will have to recreate yourselves, not some funny or glamorized versions of yourselves, but an honest recreation. Now, it could be something abstract or solid, depending on the part of yourself you wish to display. As long as it is honest, you are guaranteed to pass.”

Some of the students groaned, while others radiated excitement as their eyes raked over the materials.

“You can use the duration of this class to brainstorm, when you’re done, take the material’s you need and get to work as soon as possible. The assignment is due in a week.”

Now that got Mr. Boo more groans than excitement.

Jisung flipped his notebook open to a blank page, Chenle did the same.

When Jisung worked on creating a video game, he usually focused on what he wished the world could be rather than who he wished he could be.

But this assignment wasn’t about creating something new, this was about copying something that already existed.

Jisung supposed it was simple enough, if only he could choose something specific…

He liked dancing almost as much as he enjoyed being omniscient.

When he danced, he didn’t feel so different from the people around him.

Dancing was probably also easier to convey in an artwork than omniscience.

He started sketching a stick man with music notes flying off of his feet and shoulders.

He snuck a glance at Chenle’s page to find it suspiciously blank.

“I thought you’d have about a hundred ideas down by now.” Jisung said in a low voice.

Chenle didn’t say anything. His hair fell into his eyes as he looked down at his notebook.

Jisung regretted speaking instantly. And started thinking of something to say that would change the mood.

Apparently he didn’t have to speak because Chenle brightened and said, “Do you think Mr. Boo would appreciate a clown version of me?”

The changes in Chenle’s mood were so quick, Jisung got whiplash. For a moment, he almost missed the joke entirely and reminded Chenle that Mr. Boo had specifically stated that they have to be honest, and he knew for a fact that Chenle did not think of himself as a clown.

But he laughed with him instead making sure to shake his head slightly just in case Chenle was serious and went back to his own notebook.

“Mr. Boo, if I may?” Renjun said.

Their teacher raised his eyebrows, “Didn’t I ask you to pretend you were in an alternate universe where no one else was in the room with you and where speaking was punishable by death?” He said.

“Yeah, ha ha,” He actually said ‘ha ha’. Jisung pressed a hand to his forehead. “I just think the assignment is too difficult to finish planning in an hour… Please don’t kick me out.” He said the last part quickly.

Mr. Boo stared at him for what felt like an eternity. Jisung felt bad for him, he was only trying to help.

“He’s right,” Jisung said. “I haven’t thought of anything and it’s been over fifteen minutes.” He discreetly turned the page to a blank one in case Mr. Boo decided to check.

“Yeah, I’m beat too.” Chenle said. He didn’t have to change the page he was on, it was blank.

“I’ll think about it. That doesn’t mean you get to stop thinking though so keep going.”

“Am I getting kicked out?” Renjun asked.

“No.” Mr. Boo said grudgingly.

Chenle nudged Jisung with his shoulder, “Hey, check this out.”

On Chenle’s screen, Small Head was getting ready to leave his flat. They both held their breaths while he left, only relaxing when they saw that he hadn’t taken any of his equipment with him.

Jisung checked his own phone, “He’s picking up pizza.” He told Chenle with a smile.

“Pizza…” Chenle sighed even though they had just eaten.

“After dance?” Jisung asked.

“After dance.” Chenle agreed.

Jisung spent the rest of the class drawing dancing computers until he drew one that looked halfway decent. Chenle was drawing a triangular pepperoni pizza with a hypnotizing eye in the middle.

The teacher agreed to give them a couple of days of planning before they had to start working and gave them an extra week to work on it.

They both high-fived Renjun as thanks and the class started chanting his name. Jisung and Chenle almost carried him onto one of the worktables but Mr. Boo raised his brow and they stopped.

 

Chenle was waiting for Jisung outside his final class.

It was Chenle’s turn to buy the team coffee since he had been gone all summer.

They walked to the cafe together.

Although the sun was nowhere to be found, Jisung felt hot after the tiring day. Thankfully, the air was light and crisp. He gratefully lifted his head as the sky took pity on him and small droplets fell onto his cheeks.

Chenle let out a whoop, catching droplets on his tongue as he skipped around Jisung. Jisung caught Chenle’s mood like it was a virus and he had no firewalls.

He looked around for a puddle to kick, but it had only drizzled sporadically throughout the day, so the ground was mostly dry. He dropped one of his shoulders and swung his back bag forward, slipping his water bottle from the zipper.

He held it and slowly unscrewed the cap, maintaining eye contact with Chenle as he did.

“Jisung think about this.” Chenle warned.

The yell Chenle let out sent Jisung howling. He doubled over with laughter at the sight of Chenle scowling with his hair dripping wet and sticking to his forehead.

Chenle took a deep breath, licking the water off his lips before he lunged. He tackled Jisung to the ground. Thankfully the grass broke Jisung fall as Chenle landed on top of him and shook like a wet dog, sprinkling water onto Jisung’s face. He tried to shrink away, the grass tickled his cheeks as he dug his head into the mud. The earthy scent, made stronger by rainfall, invaded his senses.

He stared up at Chenle mirthfully. Chenle was smiling in that far off way he’d taken to doing lately. Jisung wanted him to stop smiling like that so he pushed off the ground to switch their positions.

He just barely managed to push him off of him. Instead of switching their positions, they ended up on their sides, still looking at each other. Jisung blinked against the bright green blades that separated his face from Chenle’s.

Chenle laughed a little, “Taeyong’s going to kill us.” he said, picking grass off of his pants and standing up.

“Whatever,” Jisung said, getting up as well. “We have time to clean up the studio after we’re done.”

The rest of the walk to the cafe was uneventful. At one point Jisung pushed Chenle lightly only to get pushed by hard enough to trip.

He didn’t try pushing him after that.

They kicked mud off their shoes a few times before entering the café. Then thoroughly scrubbed their shoes back and forth then sideways against the welcome mat.

They would not have bothered had there not been a possibility that Mark or Jeno had a shift today.

They went inside to find Mark behind the counter.

“BIG HEAD NUMBER 3!” Chenle yelled. Customers turned around to stare at him, some angrier than others. His smile never faltered as he marched towards Mark.

Chenle went behind the counter. Jisung caught the way Mark’s eyes danced around the café, probably checking if his boss was around, before he put his arms around Chenle, “Welcome back.” He said.

Mark was smiling right before they broke apart, then he saw the mud that covered Chenle’s clothes and now also covered the front of his apron as well. The smile melted right off of his face.

“Chenle why?” He asked in a small voice.

Jisung smiled, fondly recalling old times.

“Couldn’t resist, sorry.” Chenle smiled. “So when do you start college with your _boyfriend_?”

Mark’s smile returned upon the mention of Haechan, “Next week.”

“Can someone take my order?” Jisung said. “And why is the staff so dirty? Isn’t it enough that they’re lazy?” He added.

Mark let out a frustrated sound and gave Jisung a look. His hair looked darker to Jisung, “Did you dye your hair black?” Jisung asked.

“Uh.” Mark said.

“Are you planning on cutting it?” Chenle said, cutting Mark off. “If so, don’t. You look so much better this way and Haechan’s a good looking guy, you don’t want him to lose interest, do you?”

“Um.” Mark said.

“He’s also really smart,” Jisung stated. “So he’ll weigh his options without even knowing that he’s doing it, it’ll just happen one day.”

“Yeah,” Chenle agreed. “So the dark color was a nice touch. Good job. Try to keep him interested for as long as you can.”

Mark’s mouth opened and closed a few times before he said, “What will you be having today?”

They gave him the long list of orders, most of which he already knew. When they told him to write Haechan’s name on one of the drinks his eyes widened, “He’s going to dance practice today?”

“Yeah, he’s just watching. Jeno invited him.” Jisung said.

“Did he not tell you?” Chenle asked. “Don’t worry, it’s probably just because he hasn’t seen your hair yet.” He assured him.

“He’s seen it.” Mark said almost inaudibly, his lower lip jutting out.

Johnny was making the drinks when a bigger wave of concern covered Mark’s face, “Has Donghyuck said anything?” He asked Jisung.

Jisung was beyond confused, “What do you mean?”

“I mean, is he bored? Like, did he say something to you about me?”

Jisung couldn’t help but laugh. Chenle answered in his place, “We were just kidding, Mark.”

“O-oh,” Mark forced a smile. “Okay… Good.”

“We’ll see you next weekend!” Chenle said.

“What’s next weekend?” Mark raised his eyebrows.

Jisung kicked Chenle.

“Or not,” Chenle said, trying to save the situation. “Who knows? Bye!”

After they left the café, each carrying a bag of drinks stacked on top of each other, Jisung asked, “Were we too hard on him?”

“No,” Chenle answered. “As always, we were nothing short of useful.”

“You’re right.”

“He’s cute though.”

“Who?”

“Mark. It’s fun to tease him because he’s cute.”

Jisung shook his head, “He’s not cute.” He said just because Chenle said the opposite.

Chenle raised his eyebrows, “You think someone else is cuter?”

Jisung looked at him until Chenle pointed to his own chest, a question mark in his eyes.

Jisung nodded.

“Thanks.” Chenle said with a laugh.

Jisung smiled, almost shoving Chenle, but remembering the drinks at the last moment and changing his mind.

The dance studio was still empty when they arrived, Chenle was struggling to find his key, while Jisung watched from the side even though his keys were in his front pocket and he could’ve easily opened the door minutes ago.

He waited for Chenle to unlock the door before revealing his set of keys and laughing under his breath as rage overtook Chenle’s features. He put the bag down near the door and ran inside.

Chenle did the same, meaning to tackle Jisung, but his attention was diverted when they decided to connect the speakers to Jisung’s phone.

Jisung played his favorite song and joined Chenle on the mountain of yoga mats he’d assembled.

They nodded along to the song, Jisung occasionally popping while sitting and Chenle snapping his fingers and beat boxing badly.

Ten minutes later, they were in a post-school comatose like state.

Jisung peered at Chenle through one eye. Chenle had an arm folded under his head as he lay on his back. Jisung turned more onto his side to get a better look. He thought Chenle looked a little different when he was asleep. The realization bothered him, but he didn’t know why.

He felt kind of shaky, like he couldn’t get the right amount of oxygen in.

Heat rose up to his cheeks.

 _Was this a panic attack?_ It felt a little like it…

He reached out with his right hand and paused when it was close to his friend’s face.

Chenle didn’t move.

He stretched out his index finger until it hovered right over Chenle’s nose, then he let it drop onto the tip of his nose once.

Chenle opened his eyes sleepily, a frown contorting his peaceful expression. He stretched his arms to the sides, pushing at Jisung’s ribs lightly as he did.

His eyes crossed as he stared at Jisung’s offending finger, which still hovered over his face.

Jisung closed his thumb and index finger around Chenle’s nose.

Chenle let out a nasally yell and pushed a laughing Jisung away.

That was when Taeyong arrived.

Apparently, they shouldn’t have worried about the mud because Taeyong didn’t even notice as he pulled Yuta along with him, giggling and whispering into his ear.

Yuta’s eyes met a smirking Jisung’s. He tapped Taeyong on the shoulder, alerting him to the two boys’ presence.

“Chenle!” Taeyong exclaimed. “Welcome back.” He smiled warmly.

Yuta turned his phone off. Jisung remotely turned it back on and changed his background to a picture of Chenle and Renjun just to piss him off.

Yuta rolled his eyes and put his phone in his pocket, “It’s a cute picture, I love it, thank you.”

Jisung clenched his fist.

Jeno, Jaemin, and Renjun arrived with Haechan.

Haechan greeted Chenle briefly before noticing the name on his coffee. He smiled at it stupidly.

Mark had spent too long writing Haechan’s name. When Jisung and Chenle inspected the cup at the café, they saw that he had written ‘Donghyuck’ in ugly calligraphy and had drawn a thousand hearts around it.

“Ew.” Jisung informed his brother.

Haechan ignored him. He took a selfie of himself kissing his plastic cup, for Mark, Jisung correctly assumed.

When he was done, his expression sobered, “Are you okay?”

“Yeah, why?” Jisung said, already guessing the reason behind his brother’s concern.

“The guys told me about the asshole from this morning, why didn’t you tell me?”

“What difference would it have made if I did?”

Haechan took a deep breath, then released it, “I know you already know this, but this asshole’s going to be working for you one day.”

“I can’t wait that long to have the satisfaction of making people like him pay for the shit they do.”

Haechan cocked his head and stared at his brother thoughtfully. Jisung was too angry to care if he’d let on too much information.

Haechan finally spoke, “What does that mean?”

Jisung noticed Chenle’s absence and looked around for him. He found him following Taeyong around, mimicking his every move.

Taeyong was unaware, even as he talked to a giggling Jeno about choosing a time that wouldn’t clash with his shifts at the café. Jeno didn’t even bother suppressing his laughter as he glanced back and forth between Taeyong and Chenle’s exaggerated movements behind him.

“Chenle,” Haechan said too loudly in a chiding tone. “Are you making fun of Taeyong hyung who works so hard to keep the dance group together?” He faked a loud gasp.

Chenle’s shoulders dropped, he stared daggers at Haechan, who was doing his evil laugh.

Taeyong, having finally realized that something was happening, turned around, his mouth was hanging open as though he’d stopped speaking mid-sentence and forgotten to close it, he looked at Chenle briefly before resuming his conversation with Jeno.

Haechan’s hand on his shoulder snapped Jisung back to attention, “Just… Just be careful okay?” his brother said.

He nodded.

“Taeyong hyung?” Jaemin called. Jisung thought he heard Renjun sigh.

“Yeah?” Taeyong answered.

“Do you think speaking less often decreases the chances of people arguing with each other?”

“Sure.” Taeyong answered, then he made eye contact with a judgmental looking Yuta and changed his opinion, “I mean no, it’s always better to communicate your thoughts and feelings.”

“Ugh. Why?” Jaemin said.

“Can we start?” Jisung asked. “I have to be home by five.”

“We’re waiting for Sicheng.” Chenle told him.

“Oh.” Jisung barely finished letting out the sound before the door to the studio burst open.

Sicheng hurried in, shrugging his jacket off and apologizing, “Sorry, I was tutoring two annoyingly chatty students and they didn’t even pay me for my services.”

“What did you say about Ten?” Yuta asked.

At that exact same moment Taeyong said, “What did you say about Yoonoh?”

They both looked at Sicheng expectantly.

Chenle came up to stand behind Taeyong and copied his exact mannerisms.

Sicheng stared blankly back and said, “I said they’re annoyingly chatty and they didn’t pay me.”

“Oh.” Yuta said simply, lifting a hand as though to clear away invisible fog.

Taeyong nodded understandingly, “Yeah, that’s what I thought you said.” He smiled. Chenle did the same behind him. This time Taeyong acknowledged it and smiled. Chenle giggled and shrank back like he was ready to run even though Taeyong wasn’t mad.

Yuta put an arm around Haechan’s shoulder and they sat huddled together in a corner to watch the others practice.

Jisung saw Yuta show Haechan his phone, he looked like he was complaining and his eyes met Jisung’s. Jisung couldn’t hear them from where he was standing, but it was obvious Yuta was talking about him. Haechan gave Yuta a sip of his coffee as an apology on his brother’s behalf, Jisung guessed.

“Can we start?” Jisung asked Taeyong, all he could think about was Small Head and the idiot that broke his specs earlier that day.

“Yes, we can start now.” Taeyong said.

“Yes, we can start now.” Chenle said, his arm looped around Taeyong’s.

They started.

 

Jisung fell to the ground, his legs crumbling underneath him in exhaustion. Chenle followed, sitting cross-legged with his head hanging, lowly muttering something about Taeyong not being human while trying to catch his breath.

Jisung looked up from beneath his sweat-soaked bangs to where Taeyong was taking confident strides towards Yuta, who was in the middle of what looked like a deep discussion with Haechan.

Taeyong’s slim fingers sinking into his hair made Yuta look away from Haechan, but he didn’t look up immediately. Pink dusted his cheeks as Haechan smirked at him before moving to where Jeno, Renjun, and Jaemin were lying on top of the yoga mat bed Jisung and Chenle had built earlier.

When Jisung looked back towards Yuta and Taeyong, his breath caught. He quickly looked away. Taeyong was kneeling in front of Yuta, who craned his neck to press his lips to Taeyong’s.

Jisung traced the blemishes in the hardwood floor with a finger. His mind was oddly blank.

Chenle nudged him, “Come on, we have to go.”

 

 

“I can’t wait!” Chenle took the steps two at a time up to Jisung’s room. There was no sign of Jisung’s mom in the house and she hadn’t contacted him all day.

 _Perfect_.

Chenle went into Haechan’s room to take his chair and bring it into Jisung’s room. Well, it used to be Haechan’s chair, but since he moved out, Chenle has been the only one who using it.

They both dropped their back bags next to the bed and sat in front of Jisung’s computer.

Thankfully, they made it just in time to witness Small Head and his crew leaving the apartment.

“Here we go.” Jisung said, cracking his knuckles dramatically. Chenle’s leg jumped up and down with excitement.

Jisung hacked into the bank’s system slowly; both to put on a show for Chenle and to make sure their timing was perfect.

On his phone, he tapped into public video surveillance cameras. He moved from one camera to the other, tracing Small Head’s movement from his apartment to the bank.

When it was time, he pointed the button out to Chenle and asked him if he wanted to do the honors.

Chenle gave him an evil grin before he pushed the button.

All they had to do now was wait.

And that was when his mother walked in.

Jisung sprang away from the computer. Chenle tried to cover it with his body.

“Chenle!” Was the first word out of his mother’s mouth. She smiled widely down at Chenle, who awkwardly waved from his seat. His shoulders tensed up, no doubt worried that they were caught.

Jisung couldn’t believe he’d forgotten to lock the door.

“How was Europe?” Jisung heard his mother ask.

He figured he’d be invisible to her for a while, so he took care of the screen while she threw one question after another in Chenle’s direction.

“Aw, well that sounds wonderful!” She said, her smile still firmly fixed. Jisung wondered if her cheeks hurt.

That was when she turned her attention to him, her expression transforming into a disapproving frown immediately.

“Maybe you can help my Jisung with some of his homework?” She asked Chenle.

Jisung gave Chenle his best lost puppy expression. His mother wouldn’t be able to tell, but Chenle was clearly trying not to laugh.

He nodded at her seriously, “I’ll do my best.” He promised.

“Thank you. Jisung is so lucky to have you as a friend.” Sometimes Jisung was convinced that the one thing his mother liked about him was that he was friends with Chenle.

“So am I.” Chenle said. The way he said it made Jisung’s ears burn in embarrassment.

He cleared his throat, “We’re kind of busy, mom.”

“With homework, I hope?”

“Yeah.”

“Alright, call me if you need something.”

Jisung couldn’t help the way his eyes widened. But she was already on her way downstairs, so she thankfully didn’t notice.

Chenle got up to lock the door, “That was close.” He sighed.

“No shit.” Jisung agreed.

Jisung brought the screen back to life.

“NO!” Chenle bellowed.

Jisung put his head in his hands.

They’d missed the arrest.

They spent a couple of minutes in sullen silence, but then Chenle spoke up, “At least it worked this time.”

“Yup.” Jisung agreed, not hiding the sadness in his tone.

“Hey, I got you something.”

“Whaa?” Jisung said.

Chenle smirked, “I found them in a store in Paris and couldn’t resist buying them for you.”

Jisung’s curiosity soared. He waited expectantly.

Chenle punched his hand into his back bag and pushed his books around. His eyes lit up when he found whatever it was he had bought Jisung.

He slowly revealed a sleek box.

Jisung took it.

“Well?” Chenle asked. “Open it.”

Jisung stared at it a bit longer, turning it over in his hand. His fingers slid along the smooth surface. But then he did open it.

Inside was a pair of black-framed square glasses.

Jisung’s heart did something strange, which he ignored.

His mind flew to the shattered pair of glasses still in his hoodie’s pocket; he hadn’t gotten a chance to show them to Chenle before the idiot destroyed them.

“Clark Kent?” Jisung asked.

Chenle pointed, “Exactly! Plus, they make you look—”

“Smart.” Jisung finished for him, putting them on.

“Actually,” Chenle assessed him, cocking his head. “Never mind, nothing could make you look smart.”

Jisung laughed, hitting him lightly on the arm.

They spent an hour playing video games until Jisung started sweating and decided to take off his hoodie.

His broken specs hit the carpeted floor softly, but Chenle still noticed. He didn’t notice that they were broken at first, grinning as he picked them up, “Great minds think—” He frowned when he noticed the cracked glass. Someone else might have thought that Jisung had accidentally broken them, but Chenle knew better. “What happened?” He asked.

Jisung had to fill him in. It turned out to be for the best because it was about time for Jisung to start exacting his revenge.

When they’d posted every embarrassing picture they could find of the Idiot on his own twitter page, Chenle suggested Jisung also post his internet search history.

Jisung’s spine shivered. Chenle was the real genius between the two of them.

When they were done, Jisung was in a great mood, “Pizza?” He asked Chenle, already opening the delivery app.

“Don’t you ever get sick of it?” Chenle said out of nowhere.

“No, I love pizza.”

Chenle sighed, “I don’t mean pizza, idiot.”

Jisung widened his eyes feigning shock.

“I meant, don’t you get sick of going to school with people thousands of times dumber than you? Of pretending to be less than you actually are?”

Jisung didn’t say anything.

Chenle continued, “Come on, Jisung, you could do amazing things and you just, you just choose to live like the rest of us.”

“What’s wrong with that?”

“Don’t you want more?”

“I have enough.”

“Don’t you want to have friends?”

“I have friends, you’re my friend. Jaemin, Jeno, and Renjun are my friends—”

“I mean friends like you. Smart friends, don’t you want to meet these people you talk to on the dark web?”

“Chenle, those are criminals.”

“Wow, way to judge.”

“They’re real criminals not like us!”

“Okay what if you went to a computer science school for geniuses? They’d love you and you’d actually _learn_ stuff!”

_Where was all this coming from?_

“I study all the time.”

Chenle gave him a look.

“Don’t you want to _do_ more? Don’t you feel like you’re robbing the world? Just think of all the amazing things you could accomplish!”

“Like what?” Jisung asked, his words laced with anger and frustration.

“Like save the world!” It seemed Chenle was just as frustrated as he was.

“We’re already helping people.”

“You can do more than expose a couple of blackmailers.”

“We’ve stopped bank robberies, museum robberies, we even located a missing child once.”

“You.” Chenle said, his eyes burning into Jisung’s.

“What?”

“You did it, not us.”

“Chen—”

“I’m just saying, you could do more and nothing’s stopping you.”

Jisung’s emotions were all over the place and he didn’t know where to start. He was suddenly hit by a strong wave of loneliness. It blew out the last flame of anger he felt. And he realized that he felt very afraid.

“Don’t you know how amazing you are?” Chenle whispered.

Jisung heard him, but all that left his mouth was, “Are you trying to get rid of me?”

Before Chenle could open his mouth he continued, “Is this because of Alice? You could spend time with her instead of me at school, you know, I’m fine on my own.”

“What are you talking about?”

“I know she doesn’t like me and you’ve been with her for a while—”

“Jisung, don’t start with—”

“You’re not telling me anything so I have to start guessing!”

“This has nothing to do with her.”

“Then tell me what this is about.”

“I have to go.” Chenle was picking up his things. Jisung couldn’t move. His heart was raging in his chest and the threat of tears tickled the corners of his eyes.

He let Chenle go.

 

Jisung had hacked every spy agency there was, he had hacked NASA, and he had hacked Ten, but never had he seen something that made him freeze the way he did when he hacked his best friend. Never had he seen something that made his heart clench to the point of pain, never had his hands shaken this badly.

The tears that had previously only threatened to fall, carried through with their promise.

He didn’t mind the hot slide down his cheeks, or the way his lips wobbled.

Because Jisung knew in that moment just how colossally he had fucked up.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ZOMG!!1!!1


	4. After

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry it took me so long to update, I got busy and then I hurt my hand and wasn't able to type...
> 
> Okay so Jisung hacked Chenle :O 
> 
> Here's what happened next :O

Jisung woke up in cold sweat. One look at his bedside table told him that what happened last night was real. He shut his eyes tightly, willing the sleek box to disappear. Unsurprisingly, it was still there when he reopened his eyes.

A sudden strong wave of self-hatred hit him. He never understood why Haechan was always so insistent about him having boundaries when it came to hacking people. But he finally got it. Last night was the first time for Jisung to ever feel like he wronged someone by hacking them. Usually, when he read someone’s private text messages, he simply filtered through the information, unfeeling, until he reached his target.

Last night, his brain was quicksand to every word Chenle had typed. Every word hit him hard, shaking his very bones.

Two chat rooms was all it took, one with Alice, and another with Taeyong. The conversations corresponded with each other and fortified two different realizations that instantly hit Jisung. One was about Chenle, the other was about him.

The first confirmed that Chenle was lying to him, the second confirmed that Chenle was hiding things from him.

Both made Chenle’s words last night hurt that much more.

He stopped himself before he went too far, but he read enough. And he wasn’t naïve enough to think that stopping himself could do anything to redeem him after he’d broken his promise. He remembered wiping his tears with shaking hands, turning off his computer then his phone. For an hour he’d just sat in deafening silence, waiting for his thoughts to settle. They never did.

He wished he’d never done it, but he hadn’t been thinking about how doing it might cost him his friendship with Chenle, he was mad with the thought that their friendship was already lost.

Afterwards he realized another thing that has been facelessly driving him mad for months now. As he read Chenle’s words, its hairy little legs crept along his skin and sank its claws into his flesh and bones without his knowledge or his consent. It was as real as the keyboard under his fingers, as real as his intellect, as real as his rushing blood.

He took deep breaths. If he was calm, he could pretend he never saw anything. He could get back to normal, or at least the new normal.

He threw the sheets aside.

            After a quick shower, he got dressed in black jeans, a green hoodie, and a glossy Pepsi blue bomber jacket.

            He stood before his mirror; the glasses Chenle had given him sat in his hands.

            It occurred to him that he had yet to see what they looked like on. Last night he had been satisfied enough with Chenle’s reaction and had never bothered to look in the mirror to see what he looked like.

_Stupid, stupid, stupid._

            _He looked pretty good_ , he thought bitterly as he assessed himself in the mirror after putting them on. He didn’t wonder what Chenle would think. He knew now that he wouldn’t care.

Jisung felt awful.

Still, they were a really nice pair of glasses.

            He stared at himself for a long minute; he wished he could go back in time.

            While his mind had hungrily swallowed up Chenle’s private text messages last night, today his thoughts swam only in the safe spaces of evasion around them.

            His phone lit up.

            It was a text from Chenle.

            His heart picked up speed as he lifted the phone with quaking fingers:

Meet me by the lockers. I need to talk to you.

[Received 7:40 AM]

              It took him a minute, but he decided to text back. He squeezed his brain for something to say. ‘ _Ok.’_ He typed experimentally then immediately deleted it.

              It made it sound like he didn’t really want to talk, which he didn’t, but he also did at the same time.

He scrolled through his photo album, looking for something to send that might be a suitable response but could also diffuse the tension.

              Nothing felt right and he’d never felt more inadequate.

              He locked his phone and placed it in his pocket with a sigh.

              He needed to leave now if he was going to make it in time to talk to Chenle before class.

              Still, he found himself dragging his feet on the walk to school. A stray cat caught his attention and he watched it lick itself for a few minutes before it got bored and trotted away lazily.

            He stopped walking entirely when he was outside the school building. Students pushed past him. He heard a few complaints about him standing in the way.

            “Hey, freak!” Someone called. He knew the voice well. It was the student who had broken his specs the day before. Usually, people didn’t dare look Jisung in the eye after he’d punished them. But this guy seemed particularly bold as he grabbed Jisung’s arm the same way he had yesterday and pulled him to the side.

            “I know what you did, you think you’re just going to get away with it?”

            “I don’t know what you’re talking about.” Jisung said, making sure to smirk.

It had the desired affect; the guy fumed. But what Jisung hadn’t accounted for was a physical reaction. He was grabbed by the shoulders and pushed against the concrete wall. His back ached from the impact and he almost let out a groan, but he pressed his lips together to stop himself. He tasted his own blood as he instinctively bit down, breaking the flesh.

He looked around for a teacher or one of his friends. Any pair of eyes that met his own were immediately averted. None of his friends were in sight.

He was alone in this.

He was alone.

He was always going to be alone.

            He felt his anger flare up and welcomed the feeling, letting it take control of him.

            He could hardly recognize his own voice as he spoke, “So last night’s humiliation wasn’t enough for you, huh? You just had to come back for more.”

            He felt the hands fisted in his jacket loosen infinitesimally. He plunged on, “Maybe you enjoy suffering… I can give you what you want. Do you enjoy having a roof over your head? Because I can make it go away, you know, is that the kind of thing you like?” The loose hold in his jacket disappeared entirely as a look of sheer fear covered the bully’s face. “What about your kid brother,” Jisung threatened, getting in the guy’s face. “Do you like having him around?”

“You’re bluffing.” He stuttered, not sounding very convinced of his own statement.

“Do you want to put that theory to the test?” Jisung whispered.

            “I- I’m sorry. Look, please just—I’ll never bother you again.” He backed away from Jisung.

            Jisung stared at him, keeping his eyes cold until he was out of sight. When he was gone, Jisung sighed, unclenching his jaw.

            He checked his phone. He had about five minutes to talk to Chenle.

            He licked his lips, making sure none of the blood showed and smoothed his jacket with his palms.

            When he reached the lockers, Chenle was waiting for him. Jisung didn’t know why he expected the other boy to look any different than he had last night.

            But Chenle still had the same dark hair, big smile, and kind, playful eyes. One of his arms was crossed over a simple navy hoodie while the other held up his phone. Whatever was on the screen must have been hilarious because his eyes were wet with laughter.

            Jisung considered bolting. He could tell Chenle he’d overslept later on. Yes, he could go home now and tell him he’d woken up with a cold.

            It was too late though because Chenle spotted him.

            Jisung walked slowly towards his friend, making sure to look as natural as possible.

            When he was right in front of Chenle, he felt his heart fall into his stomach.

            “Hey, you wore the glasses.” Chenle said. Jisung found that he couldn’t really look into his eyes.

            _Did you take Taeyong’s advice? Are you texting him now?_ Jisung wanted to ask.

“Hi.” He said, focusing on Chenle’s lips instead of his eyes. He realized that it wasn’t a good idea as heat rose to his cheeks. He shouldn’t be looking at Chenle’s lips. He shook his head and focused on Chenle’s eyebrows instead. He tried to smile.

            “Uh,” Chenle started awkwardly, “Wanna skip first period?”

            They’d skipped class together many times before. Normally, Chenle wouldn’t ask, he would just say ‘Let’s skip’ and drag Jisung after him. Something Jisung had always loved, because it was a sign of how close they were. Hell, there was a time when he thought they could read each other’s minds. Boy was he wrong about that.

“Yeah.” Jisung found himself saying. His voice sounded distant as his heart pounded loudly in his ears. He could still detect the disappointment in his own tone, but he knew better than to think he still had a right to be disappointed in anything Chenle did after what he’d done last night.

“I kind of miss Mark, let’s go annoy him.” Chenle suggested and reached for Jisung’s arm. When he closed his fingers around Jisung’s wrist, Jisung worried he might be able to feel his rapid pulse.

Because classes hadn’t started yet, no one noticed them as they slipped past the school entrance.

The walk to the café was quiet, except for a few random remarks Chenle made every minute or so. Jisung, on the other hand, didn’t say anything at all. He simply nodded and made non-committal sounds at whatever Chenle said.

Chenle’s hand was still curled around his wrist. He was sure the other boy could feel his pulse, especially as he occasionally looked at Jisung with a silent question in his eyes.

Chenle had held him like this at least a thousand times, but Jisung had never felt this way before.

Or maybe he always had, but was never able to face it before last night.

He pulled his arm free.

Chenle stopped walking.

After a sigh, Chenle started speaking, “Listen, yesterday…”

_Here it comes_ _…_

“I just think—” He paused. “I already told you what I think. But you know what you want better than anyone else. I just thought I’d let you know what I think just to get you to consider the possibilities in case you haven’t. And if you’re worried about losing m-- us when you end up at a different school or a different place or whatever, I’m just telling you that you won’t. We’ll always be your friends. Just think about what you really want.”

_Okay, maybe not._

Jisung blinked at Chenle. _You don’t want to know what I want._ He thought desperately.

He squeezed his brain for something to say, but he couldn’t access anything remotely usable.

What he wanted was to ask Chenle about the texts he’d seen last night. What he wanted was to know why Chenle was trying so hard to get rid of him. What he wanted was to stop having feelings for his best friend who clearly didn’t feel the same way about him.

Jisung stretched his lips into a smile. “I don’t know what I want yet, Chenle. I’m just so confused about so many things.”

Chenle took a long minute to answer, but eventually he said, “With that gigantic head of yours, I’m sure you’ll figure it out.”

 

Mark was devastated when they found him. His apron was on backwards and his cap sat askew on his head.

“That looks like it took too much effort for it to be an accident.” Chenle said, nudging Jisung and pointing at Mark’s apron, the string, which he’d tied to the front of his neck, looked like it was choking him.

“He definitely did that on purpose.” Jisung agreed. Chenle nodded.

Mark looked down to where he’d tied the green string around his middle, the loose bow sat under where his shirt was tucked into the front of his pants. He didn’t make any effort to correct his obvious mistake.

“He was supposed to come over after my shift today.” Mark said.

“When was that?” Jisung asked, already texting Haechan in his pocket.

“Close to an hour ago. You two were right, he’s definitely sick of me. But I have to ask him if he is because I promised I wouldn’t make assumptions anymore. God, this sucks so bad.” Mark muttered, putting his head in his hands.

A second after Jisung sent his text, Mark’s phone started ringing. When he saw the caller ID, he pulled apron off from around the front of his neck, it fell gracelessly down his back and rested against the backs of his thighs.

“Hey.” Mark said, moving away until he was out of earshot.

“Haechan’s been so busy planning Mark’s party, he’s starting to neglect him.” Jisung told Chenle.

“It’s tragic.” Chenle put his chin in his palm and nodded into it.

Jisung didn’t realize he was staring until Chenle lightly kicked him under the table, “Are you alright? You seem weird today.”

“I’m fine.”

“You’re not still mad about what I said right?” Chenle sounded worried.

“No, I’m not mad about that.” Jisung lied.

“Alice called me last night.” Chenle said suddenly. Jisung almost choked on his spit.

“Oh?” He said. _Why didn’t you tell me you two broke up months ago?_

“She wanted to apologize to you, but she’s too embarrassed. She told me to tell you that you just caught her at a bad time.”

“It’s fine…” Jisung said. Questions burned through his mind, he kept them leashed.

“What exactly happened yesterday?” Chenle asked tentatively.

“She snapped at me, I think she was crying.” Jisung knew he was walking on shaky ground, but he needed to be sure he hadn’t misunderstood the information he gained. “You guys aren’t… are you still…?”

“What?” Chenle asked, his face completely blank. It was such an innocent expression that Jisung almost believed him despite what he’d seen last night.

Something dark twisted in his chest.

“Nothing.” He said. _Why do you keep lying?_

“I can tell something’s wrong. Why won’t you tell me?”

_Why did you and Alice break up?_

_Who is the new girl you like?_

_Why did you ask Taeyong about it and not me? Not Renjun? Why why why why--_

“It’s not like you tell me everything.” Jisung said angrily. He regretted it instantly after seeing the way Chenle’s expression crumbled.

Chenle looked at his watch calmly, “We can make it back in time for second period.” He was looking somewhere behind Jisung.

“Let’s go then.” Jisung said.

 

They got into trouble for coming to school late. But Chenle managed to charm their teacher out of giving them detention while Jisung stared at the wall behind him.

It was only at lunch that Jisung finally relaxed. Jaemin was scribbling furiously into a small notebook Jisung had never seen before. Jeno must have noticed the way Jisung was staring because he explained, “That’s Jaemin’s Problems and Solutions homework.”

Jisung raised his brows. _The entire notebook?_

Chenle snatched the notebook out of Jaemin’s grasp. Jaemin didn’t seem to mind as Chenle read out the list he’d written, in fact, he seemed beyond excited, if the sparkle in his eyes was anything to go by.

“Jisung took my pencil in the middle of second period and never gave it back.” Chenle read out. He narrowed his eyes at Jaemin, who in turn narrowed his eyes at Jisung and held out his palm.

“Well?” Jaemin said.

Jisung shrugged. He didn’t even remember borrowing the pencil.

Jaemin looked at him with disgust, then leaned across the table and ruffled his hair.

Jisung tried not to let his confusion show.

“Go on.” Jaemin instructed Chenle, slipping his fingers out of Jisung’s hair and leaning back.

“Jeno is too perfect.” Chenle read out, this time he looked grossed out.

Jeno turned a concerning shade of red.

“That’s a complaint?” Renjun asked.

“Yes.” Jaemin said, giving a spluttering Jeno heart eyes.

“I don’t want to keep reading this anymore.” Chenle said.

Jisung took the notebook from him. It was almost full, “Jaemin how many things did you write?”

“I have a lot of problems, now give it back.”

Jisung ignored him. He wanted to read some more, “Haechan and Mark are disgusting—Hey, how are they any different from you and Jeno?” Jisung felt very defensive of his brother all of a sudden.

“They’re gross, we’re not. It’s simple, really.”

“You’re a lot more gross than Mark and Haechan.” Chenle said before biting into his sandwich.

“You’re just saying that because you helped them get together.” Jeno accused.

“I just thought of three more entries, give me my notebook.” Jaemin took his notebook back.

“My name was all over that notebook.” Jisung complained.

“Yes, you’re really horrible to me.” Jaemin said, then blew him a kiss.

Jeno sulked.

“How am I—” Jisung started.

“Let’s not get into this.” Jeno said.

Renjun put an arm around his shoulder in solidarity.

“Jisung,” Chenle said. “Do you know what you’re making for our art project?”

“Something malfunctioning.” He said.

He was hoping they’d laugh. He didn’t expect the total silence that came after he said it, nor did he expect the uncomfortable expressions on his friends’ faces.

“What?” He asked. Everyone went back to eating except for Chenle, who was looking at Jisung.

He turned his head to face him, “Did you think of anything?” Jisung asked, sounding more defensive than he wanted.

“Not really, no.”

“We have another day.” Jisung said.

“Let me know if you guys need help.” Renjun offered.

“Me too.” Jeno and Jaemin chorused.

“You’ll regret this.” Chenle smiled at the three of them, waving his sandwich threateningly in their faces.

After that, they went back to normal chatter. Jisung kept glancing at Chenle as though he could somehow get a glimpse into his thoughts.

“You’re in my seat.” A high voice called from behind Jisung.

Jisung whipped his head around so fast his glasses slipped a little down his nose. He pushed them up as he stared in total shock at his brother.

Everyone jumped up from their seats to greet him. Jaemin and Renjun hugged him like they hadn’t seen him last night. Jisung felt the need to as well. It wasn’t that he missed him, because he had just seen him too. But he’d missed seeing him at school and he was sure the rest of the group felt the same way.

Chenle was laughing at Jeno’s rendition of Jaemin’s shocked face when he first saw Haechan. Jisung slid a little closer to Chenle to make room for Haechan.

Jisung asked, “What are you doing here?”

“I needed to talk to you guys.” Haechan said as he sat next to him.

“You couldn’t have texted?” Jisung said. Haechan’s hand came up to touch Jisung’s back.

“I was bored, Mark’s busy and Yuta was ignoring me.” Haechan said, dropping his hand in his lap.

“The school just let you in?” Jaemin asked, his eyes were still sparkling with delight.

“I’m the school’s pride and joy, of course they let me in!” Haechan said confidently. “But, the principal asked me to give a pep talk of sorts about college to a few classes, so as soon as we’re done talking I have to run.”

“Oh, which classes are you going to lecture?” Renjun asked with genuine curiosity.

“No, you’re not listening, I’m going to make a run for it, so let’s finish this quickly.”

Chenle laughed so hard, he fell on Jisung’s shoulder. Jisung naturally leaned his head closer to Chenle’s, his scalp tickled, making him shiver, as his locks and Chenle’s were laced.

He was vaguely aware of the rest of the guys talking, but he couldn’t focus on what they were saying because Chenle lifted his head ever so slightly from his shoulder and their eyes met.

His breath caught. He was overtaken by an onslaught of emotion. Chenle’s gaze was so clear, so open that Jisung wanted to ask him everything right then and there.

The side of Chenle’s mouth quirked up as he looked at Jisung. Jisung couldn’t find it in him to smile as his face heated.

He suddenly noticed that the tips of Chenle’s ears were pink, “Are you cold?” He asked.

Chenle looked confused for a second. But then he saw where Jisung was looking and pinched his right ear between his thumb and forefinger, “A little.” He said with a laugh.

Jisung briefly touched the back of Chenle’s free hand; it was freezing. He pulled out his phone and adjusted the school’s heating.

When it was done, he looked up to find Chenle smiling at him strangely.

“What?” For some reason, he felt the need to whisper it. Chenle heard him despite the noise in the cafeteria. He was so close to Chenle that his breath moved the stray hairs in his bangs.

“Nothing.” Chenle said, bemused smile still plastered to his face.

“Uh, guys?” Haechan said, his voice suddenly louder behind Jisung.

Jisung straightened and looked to his left, where his brother was staring at him and Chenle like they’d grown horns.

“What?” He asked Haechan, his tone flippant, the exact opposite of how it had been when he’d said it to Chenle.

“Are you in?” Haechan asked impatiently pulling at his turtleneck.

“In what?” Chenle asked.

Haechan let out a sound of frustration, “The principal’s probably looking for me as we speak!” He said urgently. “Look, give them the details,” This was addressed to Renjun, Jaemin, and Jeno. Then he looked at Jisung and Chenle and said, “I can’t keep lying to Mark, so we’re having the party tonight.”

Jisung stood, his fingers threading through his own hair, “What,” He yelled, finally giving his brother his full attention, “We’re not prepared!”

“Yeah, I haven’t bought my clown costume yet or anything.” Chenle admitted.

“Clown costume?” Haechan asked Chenle, but he was looking at Renjun.

“It was just a joke, we’re not actually going to do it.”

“We haven’t bought decorations or anything, and they keep messing up the cake,” Jisung pointed in Renjun, Jeno, and Jaemin’s direction. “Smell them!”

“How’d you know about the cake?” Jaemin asked, his eyes narrowing.

Haechan rolled his eyes, “We’ll manage, and I don’t really want to smell anyone right now, thanks.” He got up, rolling up his sleeves as he did. “Jeno give me your cap.”

“I’m not wearing a cap.” Jeno said.

“Well, why not?” Haechan asked, completely serious.

Jeno widened his eyes.

Renjun fished a yellow scarf out of his bag, “Here, use this.”

Haechan wrapped it around the lower half o his face, “So?” He asked.

“You might as well scream your name down the hall, you look so obvious.” Jisung said.

“You look idiotic.” Chenle added.

“You look very inconspicuous.” Jaemin said.

Haechan clearly chose to ignore the first two statements along with the blatant sarcasm in the third, “Thank you!” he said and literally ran his way out of the cafeteria.

“So what did he say exactly?” Jisung asked once Haechan was gone.

“Basically, we have to have the party tonight or else Haechan is going to have to tell Mark the truth because Mark is afraid Haechan wants to break up.” Jeno explained.

“Did Mark say that to him?” Chenle asked.

“No,” Renjun answered. “Haechan said he could just tell.”

Lunch period was over. Jisung didn’t feel like going to class.

On one hand he was nervous about Mark’s party, but on the other he couldn’t care less because he had a lot to worry about without the additional stress.

“Are you—” Chenle said then stopped himself. “We should get to class.”

Jisung sighed, “Let’s go.”

“I’m coming with.” Renjun said.

They did not run to art class, although they probably should have.

But they were only a couple of minutes late, and Mr. Boo didn’t seem to mind. It was just a brainstorming class anyway.

Jisung used his peripheral vision to check if Chenle had come up with anything.

The other boy had drawn a few faces and crossed them out. Although he’d crossed over them heavily many times, Jisung could still make out that their mouths and eyes were wide open.

“I can’t draw for shit.” Chenle said, leaning away from his notebook.

“Same here.” Jisung said even though he knew that Chenle was well aware. “I’ve got a riddle for you,” Jisung said, his heart skipped a beat but he continued anyway, “Where is a computer most useless?”

Chenle cocked his head in confusion. “I don’t know, where?”

“I’m trying to figure it out too.” Jisung lied.

“I’m going to ask Renjun to help me with my project, but I’m ready to submit the idea.”

“What is it?” Jisung asked.

“You’ll see when it’s ready.” Chenle winked and wrote a single word on the corner of the page before tearing it and putting it in the empty glass bowl their teacher had placed at the center of his desk.

Jisung turned to his own page and scribbled the words, _A computer in love (malfunctioning) –Park Jisung_.

Chenle returned to their booth just as Jisung slid out of it. His eyes squinted slightly but then he started working on a paper airplane bearing a message for Renjun.

The remainder of the school day passed quickly.

Chenle was waiting for Jisung outside his final class again today and Jisung didn’t hide the sigh of relief he let out when he saw him there.

“We should at least get Mark a hat.” Chenle said as they walked out.

“A hat?”

“Yeah, a party hat.”

Jisung liked the idea, “Okay, let’s get him a hat.” He texted the Mark’s Party group chat asking them if they needed anything.

 

Renjun: SODA.

Jeno: A cake!!!!

Nana: We’re making the cake now, don’t buy a cake.

Renjun: Buy a cake!!!

Jeno: Buy a cake!!!

Lele: Buy a cake!!!... Wait, what’s going on?

Nana: OH MY GOD THE OVEN EXPLODED BUY A CAKE!!!

Renjun: My parents are going to kill me…

Nana: We’ll replace your oven before they get back from China, Haechan has rich friends.

Renjun: You’re right!

Lele: I’m rich.

Renjun: Nobody asked.

Haechan: Shut up, I’m with Minhyung, he’ll hear you!

Unknown Number: Who’s Minhyung?

Haechan: Hi, Lucas.

Lele: Tell Mark I love him!

G-sung: Who’s Lucas?

Nana: Who’s Lucas?

Haechan: I added him, he’s a friend.

Unknown Number: Hello, I’m Lucas.

Renjun: This is a chat room, Haechan, Mark can’t hear us.

Jeno: OMG! You’re right he might hear us, shhhhhh…

Unknown Number: So Minhyung is Mark?

Nana: Jeno…

Haechan: Yes, Lucas, but don’t call him that.

G-sung: Okay so we’ll buy soda, a cake, and a hat.

Haechan: A hat?

Haechan: Whatever, and never mind the cake, Doyoung’s got it covered.

Nana: :(

Jeno: :)

Renjun: :)

Unknown Number: :)

G-sung: -_-’

Lele: <3

Haechan: See you guys later!!!

 

            Jisung locked his phone, “Let’s buy a hat.”

            They bought the hat, the only one available had been a Dora the Explorer birthday hat, but Chenle insisted that it would be perfect for Mark. Now they were each dragging a bag full of soda bottles to Renjun’s house.

            “Why did we volunteer to do this again?” Chenle asked, twisting his face in pain. The sun was setting and the cold air was almost unbearable.

            “Because Mark is our baby?” Jisung asked.

            “Yeah…” Chenle breathed. “Let’s not have a baby again.”

            “Deal.”

            Jaemin ran outside to help them, “You two should really consider taking up a sport.” He said as he took both bags with ease and ran back into the warmly lit house.

            Chenle fell into the grass of Renjun’s front yard, Jisung collapsed next to him. “I watch basketball.” Chenle called after Jaemin.

            “I’m sure that counts.” Jisung said, his laughter coming out in visible puffs.

            “Let’s get inside, it’s freezing.” Chenle stood over Jisung, his arm outstretched.

            He took Chenle’s icy hand in his.

            Chenle didn’t let go when Jisung was standing up.

            Again, this was something they did often, without thinking about it. But right now it didn’t feel right. Jisung slipped his fingers out of Chenle’s palm. Another questioning look from Chenle was avoided because a college-age looking guy was trying to get their attention. He had a box between his hands.

            “Doyoung?” Chenle asked.

            A gummy smile was their answer.

            Once everything was in place, they settled down in the living room.

            Doyoung was on his phone, likely a result of him feeling awkward between them.

            Thankfully Haechan came running in, his hair tousled by the wind.

            “Is Mark with you?” Jaemin asked.

            “No, I convinced him to meet me here later.”

            “How?” Jisung asked.

            “I have my ways.” Haechan said with a wink, Jisung was convinced he was doing this because he enjoys being actively gross. He instantly regretted defending him and Mark at lunch.

            “Okay, we don’t want to know.” Renjun said.

            “I kind of want to know.” Chenle said.

            “What?” Jisung said.

            Chenle shrugged.

            “Oh, hi, Doyoung.” Haechan hugged the life out of Doyoung, but he didn’t seem to mind.

            “Taeyong and Yuta are on their way.” Doyoung said when they broke apart.

            “Taeyong’s coming?” Jisung asked Chenle.

            “Yeah, he just said that.” Chenle said, tilting his head.

            “What about Ten?” Haechan asked.

            “He’s with Sicheng and Yoonoh, they had plans.”

            “He’s with—” Haechan spoke quickly then stopped to take a deep exaggeratedly calming breath. “Yoonoh? You mean the criminal?”

            “He’s cool now.” Doyoung shrugged.

            “No, he’s really not. I’ll have a talk with Ten about this tomorrow.”

            Doyoung smiled like Haechan attacking someone’s character was the cutest thing he’d ever seen.

            Taeyong and Yuta came around 7:30.

            Jisung was trying to read Taeyong’s mind when Haechan asked him about the hat. He showed it to him and he nodded once then went to where Jeno and Jaemin were pushing one candle after another into the congratulatory cake.

            “How old is Mark now?” Jaemin asked, a thin candle hovered above the cake between his thumb and forefinger.

            “It’s not his birthday, Jaemin.” Haechan said.

            Jaemin looked at the ceiling like he had to think about it.

Haechan pushed him away from the cake before he could cause any more damage.

Jaemin pulled out his Problems and Solutions notebook and starting writing something into it.

Jisung’s eyes met Chenle’s and they both held back their grins.

Taeyong was suddenly in the doorframe, he looked a bit uncomfortable as he scanned the room.

Chenle walked over to him immediately, “Renjun can I go up to your room?”

“Don’t touch anything.” Was Renjun’s answer. Jisung heard laughter in his voice and when he looked, he found that Haechan, Jeno, and Renjun were huddled up around Jaemin’s notebook.

“Haechan wasn’t wearing the bracelet I bought him today.” Haechan read. “This is my first day going without it in months, give me a break.”

“The assignment wasn’t to give people breaks.” Jaemin answered.

By the time Jisung turned back to look for Chenle, he found that he had disappeared upstairs with Taeyong.

He didn’t have much time to dwell on the fact that Chenle was probably asking Taeyong for more advice regarding his new crush, because Mark was a few minutes away from Renjun’s.

“CHENLE GET BACK HERE MARK IS ON HIS WAY!” Haechan yelled.

It was total chaos when Mark walked in. Everyone screamed “CONGRATULATIONS!” except for Jaemin who thought it would be hilarious if he yelled “HAPPY BIRTHDAY!” which lead into a five minute explanation from Yuta to Taeyong about how it was not, in fact, Mark’s birthday and that no, they should not have bought him a gift.

Chenle was all over the place, he kept teasing Mark, laughing, dancing, making up new games and inviting whoever was paying attention to play them.

Jisung found himself feeling left out even though he played with everyone else and Chenle looked at him after every joke he made and Jaemin ruffled his hair any chance he got and Jeno asked him if he was feeling okay.

“I’m fine.” Jisung answered.

When they were all gathered around the cake, Chenle placed the pink Dora hat over a very shy looking Mark’s head.

Doyoung was filming while Jaemin sang the birthday song.

Yuta held up his screen, on which Ten’s face was watching them celebrate.

“Move the phone a little to the right.” He demanded, Yuta complied.

Haechan tasted the cream on the cake. When he caught Mark watching he put some on the tip of his finger and lifted it to Mark’s lips. Mark’s face turned bright pink, but his tongue still darted out shyly.

Screen Ten started cheering, which drove the rest of them to do the same. Yuta lifted both arms as he cheered, which caused Ten to start nagging him about not being able to see.

Haechan’s college friends left as soon as the last crumb of cake was eaten.

Afterwards, Jisung, his brother, and their friends were all stuffed and exhausted. Some of them were sprawled on the floor while others managed to find empty spots on the couch.

Jisung and Chenle were on the floor, their heads resting on the same cushion. Haechan and Mark were also on the floor, they sat the closest to them, their backs rested against the side of the couch.

Someone was playing soft music. Jisung’s eyes were just about to flutter shut when he heard Mark whisper to Haechan, “You--… You still like me, right?”

He almost laughed, but Chenle stopped him with a hand pressed against his lips. His smile froze until the other boy withdrew his hand.

“I fucki—” Haechan’s whisper was angry. Then he sighed. “Come with me.” He pulled Mark upstairs by the arm. Jisung didn’t miss the way Renjun winced.

“Okay, so there’s five of us, I think it’s fair if we play a game and the two who lose have to wash the dishes.” Jaemin said.

“Let’s just use the randomizing app.” Jeno suggested.

“Sounds fair.” Said Renjun.

Jisung put their names in. His name came up first, “Fuck.” He said, already planning his escape to the bathroom once the other person was chosen.

When he pressed it again, the name that came up was Chenle’s.

They both closed their eyes sadly while Renjun, Jaemin, and Jeno celebrated.

In the kitchen, Jisung washed while Chenle dried. They decided to switch every few dishes to force themselves to stay awake through the tedious task.

“Jisung,” Chenle said suddenly. His tone was serious, a rarity. Jisung was immediately nervous. “I think we need to talk.”

“About?” Jisung asked. He felt both sleepy and too alert at once. He was so scared that Chenle could see right through him.

“I want to know what’s been bothering you.”

“It’s nothing, Chenle.” Jisung said, scrubbing the plate in his hand a bit more vigorously than needed.

“It’s not nothing, so stop lying.” Chenle said.

Just like that, Jisung exploded, “ _Lying?_ Me? Lying?” He took a breath. “Wow, that’s rich coming from you.”

Chenle looked at him like he’d just slapped him, “What do you—”

Jisung didn’t let him finish, “How’s your girlfriend, Chenle? Why was the night before last the first time you’d texted her in months? Why did you tell her you didn’t have access to Wi-Fi in Europe when you and I face-timed at least 3 times a week every week? And who’s the new girl you like? Why would you talk to Taeyong about it and not me?” Jisung stopped for breath and in that moment what he’d just said caught up to him. He slapped his mouth with his hand.

“You hacked me.” Chenle whispered so quietly Jisung had to read his lips to know what he said.

“I can explain—”

“Just answer me. Did you hack me, breaking our promise?”

“Chenle… hold on--”

            “It’s a simple question Jisung! Did you hack me yes or no?” Chenle demanded. His face was flushed with anger and his jaw was set. Jisung had never seen him like this before.

            Jisung tried to swallow, but his mouth had gone completely dry. He felt lightheaded. He nodded.

            “You’re not normal.” Chenle said, shaking his head and moving towards the door.

            With those words, Jisung felt a concrete wall slam down between them, shutting him out of Chenle’s light.

            He was breathing hard, he could feel his heart breaking, he could taste his tears on his tongue as he licked his lips, his hands useless fists by his sides. “Chenle, wait!”

            Chenle didn’t wait. He didn’t even look back once as Jisung tried to catch up with him as he ran down the driveway.

            He stayed there, alone, watching the gravel darken with his tears until Jaemin came to take him back to the house.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> unu...
> 
> You can yell at me in the comments or on my [twt](https://twitter.com/Spaceship0Mile) or my [cc](https://curiouscat.me/Spaceship0Mile)
> 
> <3 <3 <3 <3


	5. End

Jisung woke up in a bed that was not his own. Someone’s arms were wrapped loosely around him.

 _Haechan_ , he remembered.

His brother’s breath warmed the back of his neck.

Memories of the night before came slowly, destroying his momentary sleep-begotten warm forgetfulness.

He had cried last night. His eyes still burned slightly and his throat felt sore. He’d yelled a little too.

He remembered the fear on Haechan’s face when he’d come downstairs to witness Jisung’s breakdown.

 _Stay away from me._ He had warned his brother.

No one had known what to do, least of all Jisung.

Then Haechan wrapped his arms around him. Every attempt Jisung made to free himself was met with soft calming whispers and a tighter embrace.

He remembered asking, or rather yelling at someone, anyone, to check if Chenle had made it home safe.

He remembered how small Jeno’s voice sounded when he told him that he had a minute later.

He remembered how carefully Haechan had been when he asked him what his fight with Chenle had been about.

Jisung remembered telling Haechan that he hated him.

He thought he saw a tear slide down Haechan’s face through his blurry eyes.

He remembered how guilty he’d felt.

Haechan moved behind him, “Jisung,” He whispered. “Are you awake?”

“I’m sorry.” Jisung said, his voice gravelly with sleep.

“Get up, we should eat something.” Haechan said, getting up.

Jisung felt colder alone.

He flipped onto his back when Haechan was standing by the foot of the bed, “Are the rest of the guys still…?”

He didn’t finish because Haechan shook his head, “It’s just me and Jaemin here.”

“What about Renjun?” This was his house they were in.

“School.”

Jisung looked for his phone, but he couldn’t find it. Haechan knew what he was thinking though and he informed him that it was 10 AM.

“Jaemin hates missing class.” Jisung said.

“He hated seeing you like that last night more.” Haechan answered. Jisung felt his throat close up a little. Haechan’s lips stretched into a small smile before he left the room. He was probably in the kitchen with Jaemin; Jisung could hear clattering and soft murmers.

Jisung got out of bed, his bare feet sinking into the carpet. He wished he could sink further into it until he was completely invisible.

In the bathroom he splashed cold water onto his face. He watched the droplets race their way down his chin.

His eyes were puffy.

His nose was still slightly pink.

He needed to apologize to Haechan properly.

He pressed the towel to his face.

In the kitchen, he found Jaemin frying eggs.

Haechan was sitting in one of the chairs around the kitchen island.

“I’m sorry.” Jisung said again, this time his voice was clear.

Haechan’s gaze was piercing, “Come sit next to me.”

Jisung did, his head hanging low.

Haechan’s fingers slipped through his hair.

“What are you sorry for?” He asked softly.

“I ruined Mark’s party and I scared you. I’ll apologize to Mark and the rest of the guys later.”

A plate was placed in front of Jisung then Jaemin left.

Jisung wondered if Jaemin was mad at him.

“I’m moving back home.” Haechan said. Before Jisung could protest he said, “You can’t change my mind, not after last night.” After a brief pause he continued, “Mark doesn’t care about the party and neither do I, we care about you.”

Jisung stared at his food.

“You shouldn’t care about me, none of you should.” Jisung said in a low voice.

He felt Haechan’s reaction rather than saw it. He also heard it as Haechan sucked in a quick breath, his fingers, which were drawing patterns against Jisung’s back froze before continuing their circular pattern.

“I’m…” Jisung started his sentence but found he couldn’t finish it. Chenle’s voice finished it for him in his head ‘ _You’re not normal’._

“Come on, finish your food, we need to go.” Haechan said.

Jisung gulped down his eggs, not tasting anything. “I want to apologize to Mark. Is he busy today?” Jisung asked when he was done eating.

Haechan sighed, “I’ll ask him to meet us later if that’s what you want.”

Jisung nodded.

When they were at the door, Jaemin quickly ran up to them. Jisung noticed that his hair was sticking up at random places, like he hadn’t bothered to look in the mirror. He paused in front of Jisung for a few seconds before a determined glimmer settled on his face and he wrapped his arms around Jisung.

Jisung’s upper arms were trapped thanks to Jaemin’s suffocating hold. But he managed to bend one of his arms to grab a fistful of the back of Jaemin’s shirt.

But when Jaemin started pressing quick kisses anywhere he could reach from Jisung’s hair to his ear, Jisung started pulling at the shirt to break free. His protests were ignored until he gave up, falling limp in Jaemin’s arms until he was satisfied enough to back off.

In the torturous moments during which Jisung waited out Jaemin’s seemingly endless pool of love, he noticed a foreign object in one of Jaemin’s hands, which was pressed to his shoulder blades.

When Jaemin pulled away, he saw that it was the Problems and Solutions notebook.

Jisung wondered if Jaemin added Jisung’s behavior last night to it. But Jaemin followed his gaze and opened the notebook to the last page, _Jisung is cute even when he’s being secretive and crying._

Jisung couldn’t help the outraged sound that left his throat as he pushed a pouty Jaemin away.

Jaemin promptly turned towards Haechan and held his palm open, “Pay up.” He said, suddenly all business.

Haechan flicked him in the forehead instead of paying, “Yeah you made him smile, but that doesn’t mean he’s happy fuck off.”

Jaemin rolled his eyes, handing Jisung a small blue notebook.

Jisung’s eyes narrowed.

“Use it.” Jaemin said.

Jisung flipped through it to find it empty.

“Bye, Jaemin.” Haechan said.

“Bye, Jisung. I hate you, Haechan.” Jaemin said in a cheerful tone, smile shining on his face.

 

When they were home, Haechan went into his room to put his back bag away. “WHERE’S MY CHAIR?” He yelled unnecessarily.

“In my room.”

Haechan had somehow changed out of his pullover and into a plain half-sleeved t-shirt and pajama pants in less than five seconds.

Jisung was still holding the notebook Jaemin had given him. He hadn’t even shrugged off his jacket.

Haechan threw himself onto Jisung’s bed, his arms folded behind his head, “So, what are we going to do today?”

Jisung wondered if Chenle was in school.

“Um,” Jisung started. “Wanna play? Your world is the smallest.” Since Haechan had spent the least time playing Jisung’s game, his world hadn’t had an opportunity to expand.

Chenle’s world was the largest.

“I’d rather watch you play.” Haechan said.

Jisung shrugged and woke his computer.

 

“You got yourself.” Haechan laughed, clapping his hand delightedly as the lava burned Jisung for the tenth time in a row.

“The lava got me.” Jisung corrected, running around the volcano through a new route only to get burned again.

“No,” Haechan said. “You created this game, and it’s got you figured out.”

Jisung didn’t answer, that was the purpose of the game after all. He tried flying over the volcano. His wings got singed and he fell to his death.

“Ask me what I would do.” Haechan said.

“I have to figure it out alone.” Jisung said.

“Why?”

“That’s how the game works, if I took your input it wouldn’t be my world anymore.” Jisung reasoned.

“But I am a part of your world. You could use me, the same way you used the fact that your character can sprout wings, the way I use my character’s speed.”

“What would you do?” Jisung asked after a thoughtful moment.

“Jump into the volcano.”

Jisung gaped at his brother, “What! Why?”

“Just to see what happens.” Haechan’s smile was contagious.

After healing his wings, Jisung flew until he was hovering right above the volcano, then he retracted his wings.

The free fall into the volcano was dramatic to say the least. His character fell in, smoke rose from the volcano’s mouth.

The game didn’t restart itself. His character wasn’t anywhere on the screen either.

They both held their breaths.

The volcano spat Jisung out.

When his character reappeared, it was clad in an upgraded armor.

A witch quickly rose from the volcano, she closed her eyes and raised her arms, summoning water.

Every last spark melted away. When she was done, the volcano transformed into a flowering mountain.

The following words appeared:

**+Level up**

**Leap of Faith Ability Acquired**

Jisung saved the game and turned towards his brother. “You couldn’t have known that was going to happen.”

“That’s what a leap of faith is, Jisung.” Haechan said.

“I know.” Jisung said flippantly.

“Do you?”

“Look, I’m not like you I can’t just… do things.”

“You can learn.” Haechan insisted.

They both knew they weren’t talking about the video game anymore.

“I’m not like you.” Jisung repeated in a whisper.

“But you are!”

“How many friends do you have, Haechan?” Jisung set his jaw.

Haechan looked somewhere else, he was counting.

“See, you had to stop and count just now.” Jisung said. “Do you know how many friends I have? One! And I don’t even have him anymore.”

“That’s not true,” Haechan said. “Jaemin, Renjun, Jeno, and Mark are your friends. And Chenle is still your friend, he’s just mad at you.”

Jisung stared, “They’re not my friends, they’re yours. And he hates me, there’s a difference.”

“What about me?” Haechan asked. “Am I not your friend?”

“You’re my brother, you have to deal with me.”

“You really believe that?” Haechan looked shocked and under the shock, Jisung could see that his brother’s feelings were hurt.

“I’m sorry… I—about what I said last night… I don’t hate you Haechan,” The pain, which his brother had tried to conceal, was clearly painted all over his face now. He continued. “I never have. I just—” Jisung looked down at his hands.

Haechan took them in his.

“Talk to me, I can help you.” His brother’s eyes were so sincere he had to force himself to keep his eyes dry.

Jisung told him everything.

He started from the beginning. How he hadn’t realized why he resented Alice so much when Chenle started dating her last year. He didn’t go into details when he described his vigilante work to his brother, he just told him that the less he knew the better, just in case Jisung was somehow exposed and Haechan had to take the stand at court. He didn’t want his brother to perjure himself trying to protect him. Then he told him about how Chenle seemed to want Jisung to leave, which led him to break their promise. He told him what he found out; that Chenle and Alice dated briefly months ago and Chenle ended it on good terms. Then he told Haechan about Chenle’s texts with Taeyong about the new girl Chenle liked.

“Are you sure it’s a girl?” Haechan asked.

“Yes, he used female pronouns and what does it matter anyway if he likes a girl or a guy, he’d never like me that way.”

Haechan sighed.

“It doesn’t matter, unless the person he was talking about was you.” Haechan said.

“I told you he was using female pronouns.”

“So?” Haechan gave him a look. “You’ve never used code before?” Before Jisung could say anything, Haechan pointed towards the computer, “Not that kind.”

“So… What do you think?” Jisung said when Haechan didn’t speak for a long time.

“You fucked up.” Haechan concluded.

Jisung knew that. If that was all Haechan had to offer, then the entire conversation had been nothing short of—His train of thought was interrupted because his brother was cackling.

“Why are you laughing?” He demanded.

“Your face!” Haechan said, breathing hard and laughing some more.

Jisung smacked his arm.

“I’m sorry.” Haechan gasped, schooling his expression into something akin to neutrality. But the amusement lingered in his eyes and the edges of his lips.

“You’re an ass.” Jisung stated, smiling in spite of himself. “Did you tell Mark I wanted to talk to him?”

“Yeah, I texted him.” Haechan said, flicking a tear from the corner of his eye.

“And?”

“He’s… talking to someone right now.”

“Is it Chenle?” Jisung asked urgently.

Haechan’s eyes widened and he pointed a finger at Jisung before calling Mark.

“Heeeeey,” Haechan said, winking at Jisung. “So are you with Chenle right now?”

“Mark, come on,” Haechan said into his phone. “Well, why not?” He said a moment later.

“What’s going on?” Jisung asked. Haechan ignored him.

“I could make you tell me, you know.” Haechan said in a tone Jisung wished he could delete from his mind.

“Fine,” His brother sighed in a resigned manner a moment later.

“Yeah.” A pause.

Pink cheeks, “I love you.”

Red cheeks, “I’ll see you later.”

Haechan put his phone away, “He’s with Chenle,” He said. “But he won’t disclose any information.”

Jisung tried to tame his mind. Mark liked him, right? Or did he only care about him because he was Haechan’s brother?

Jisung had been pretty mean to him when he and Chenle had helped him last spring…

“Do you know what you need?” Haechan said, breaking him out of his thoughts.

“What?”

“You need a make over.” Haechan smiled.

Jisung waved a hand at him, “No, thanks.”

“Come on, remember the volcano?”

“Honestly, I don’t care anymore so whatever.” Jisung said in monotone.

“That’s the spirit!” Haechan smacked his butt once.

 

Jisung somehow ended up with his left earlobe burning, a metal ring pierced through its center. He and Haechan were both minors, but the guy who worked at the store was apparently friends with Mark and agreed to give Jisung his illegal piercing after hearing Haechan’s harrowing narration of Jisung’s heartbreak.

“Who pierced your ear?” The guy, whose name was Johnny, asked Haechan.

“A friend.” Jisung remembered when Jaemin had pierced Haechan’s ear shortly after he’d gotten accepted to university.

“Couldn’t you have gotten that friend of yours to pierce this guy’s ear?” Johnny asked, looking pained.

“No, he thinks Jisung is too cute for piercings.”

Jisung got up to inspect his new piercing closely.

“Can you dye his hair, too?” Haechan said.

“No!” Johnny all but yelled.

“Actually…” Jisung’s thoughts were racing back through time. He thought of how he had never felt quite right outside of his house. How the first time he’d ever felt like he belonged anywhere outside his family was when he had met Chenle; the one person he found strange and not the other way around.

He thought of all the times he’d been pushed around and called names.

_Freak._

_Weirdo._

_Pervert._

_Psycho._

The pain that accompanied these memories was of the dull kind. It was there, but it lacked bite. However one memory stood out from the others.

_You’re not normal._

It was something Jisung was well aware of, something a dark voice in his head loved to remind him of. He wasn’t normal, he would never comfortably settle among his peers.

The voice in his head, like the voices of others, didn’t hurt him too badly. Because when Jisung was with Chenle, not being normal was something he loved. They were together, a team, both in spite of and because of it. Chenle accepted him as he was, he more than accepted him, he praised him, he cared about him, he---

_You’re not normal._

The words were an iron maiden closing around Jisung.

They were a confirmation of his biggest fear.

He was always going to be different.

He would always be alone.

“I want something that sticks out.”

“You just got a piercing get used to that first then come back if you still want to dye your hair.”

Jisung looked at Haechan. His brother understood what he wanted immediately.

“Are you really going to deny a young boy whose heart has recently been broken?”

Johnny looked skeptically at Jisung, who pouted.

“Okay, okay. Fine. What color are you thinking?” he asked.

Jisung liked the result. He was transformed, brand new.

But it still didn’t change who he was, what he’d done.

 

They got take-out on the way home. They sat in the living room, eating and talking. Well, Haechan did most of the talking. Jisung just focused on his food and avoided thinking.

That afternoon, Renjun, Jaemin, and Jeno dropped by. After spending an hour freaking out about Jisung’s new hair, they finally asked Jisung and Haechan if they were coming to dance class.

“Chenle’s not coming.” Renjun added before Jisung could say no.

“I don’t really feel up for it, but you guys go.” Jisung was about to head up to his room when Jaemin wrapped his arms around his middle from behind and lifted him.

Jisung kicked the air, howling.

Everyone laughed, he was laughing too. He looked around, trying to find Chenle.

He stopped laughing and Jaemin set him down.

“You smell like bleach.” Jaemin told him kindly.

“Look, thanks for coming here and everything, but I’m a bit tired so…” They took the hint and left.

When he was in his room, he closed the door behind him and sat on the bed. The blue notebook Jaemin had given him was in its center.

One person haunted Jisung’s thoughts.

He flipped it open and scribbled a single word in, _Sorry._

 

The next day Haechan forced him to go to school. He even made sure Jisung went in by walking him up to the gate. He didn’t leave until Jaemin put an arm protectively around Jisung’s shoulder and led him inside.

“How are you feeling?” Jaemin asked.

“I’m ok.” _Just feel like an ass and my hair is bright blue._

“So here’s what we’re going to…” Jisung didn’t know what Jaemin said next, it was like his voice was muted the moment Jisung’s eyes met Chenle’s across the hall.

Chenle’s eyes widened in shock then the expression disappeared. It was only after Chenle doubled back where he came from that Jisung noticed Jeno and Renjun on either side of him. Jeno stopped him from slipping around the bend with a hand on a tense shoulder while Renjun spoke to him. They were too far for Jisung to hear, and even if they were close, he wasn’t sure he’d be able to make out any words with the way his blood was rushing in his ears.

He felt trapped, and he supposed in a way he was, because Jaemin closed a hand around his upper arm to keep him where he was.

He watched Chenle’s back, still and tense. But he seemed to be listening to whatever Renjun was telling him. Jisung’s mouth was dry.

He noticed Chenle’s shoulders rise infinitesimally then drop, the tension melting away so fully, it felt almost as though its earlier existence was nothing more than a figment of Jisung’s imagination brought on by wishful thinking that Chenle still cared.

When Chenle turned and made his way towards Jisung, he could have sworn it was a stranger and not his closest friend he was seeing.

Chenle’s strides were confident and relaxed, which was typical of Chenle. But his face was cold in a way that made Jisung feel very small.

Chenle was the type of person who made everyone around him feel accepted and loved, it was one of the reasons Jisung had wanted to be his friend when he’d first seen him.

Jisung had never known it was something Chenle was capable of turning off until that moment.

Their eyes locked when he was right before him. Chenle regarded him like he was an object he needed to remove from his path.

Although his chest squeezed tightly, he forced his eyes to stay trained on Chenle’s.

He was in the wrong; he had no right to spare himself the consequence of his actions.

Renjun cleared his throat, “So, we want you guys to tell us what happened between you.”

Chenle raised his eyebrows slightly at Jisung, challenging him to go first.

If Chenle thought Jisung was worried about what the others thought of him, he was deeply mistaken.

Jisung ignored the way his hands shook.

“But before you do,” Renjun said before Jisung could speak. “We want you both to know that we will not be taking sides. We will take shifts until you two sort out your shit, which you will because you can’t not be friends, the earth will actually implode.”

“That was dramatic.” Jisung and Chenle said at the same time.

Chenle looked away, his ears were tinged pink. Jisung felt his face burning.

Jeno giggled.

The bell rang.

“He can tell you guys what he did. I don’t see why I need to be here for it. I’ll see whoever’s going to be taking my first shift at lunch then?” Chenle said before sneaking his arm out of Jeno’s grip and hurrying away from the group.

“We made a pact, Chenle and I…” Jisung explained quickly. “It was years ago, but we never forgot it; I’m not allowed to ever hack him, even as a prank.”

They watched him as carefully as he watched them. Renjun’s expression was neutral, Jeno looked upset, and Jaemin looked offended, “You hack us all the time that’s so unfair.” He said before Renjun shushed him.

“Well, I…” Jisung took a deep breath. He wasn’t used to even thinking this let alone saying it out loud and in front of actual human beings. “I realized that I developed… feelings-- for… him.” He paused. Not one of their expressions changed. He sighed in relief, “So I kind of went crazy because he was keeping secrets from me and trust me I know how this sounds and I know I fucked up and that the way I am isn’t normal but I—”

“Woah, hold on.” Renjun’s brows were furrowed. His hand came up to touch Jisung’s arm gently.

Jisung’s body flinched away from the touch. Tears threatened to spill down the corners of his eyes.

He didn’t understand himself at all.

“I can’t do this. I’m sorry.” None of them expected him to run, which in retrospect was probably the only reason he actually managed to get away.

 

Jisung wasn’t sure where he was going. He ran past the school gate, he ran past the field of grass whose sprinklers he and Chenle had played with almost every day, he ran and ran and ran until he hit something solid and bounced back from the impact, hitting his butt hard against the ground.

“Owch, fuck—” A familiar voice said. “Owww…”

Jisung slowly got up, rubbing his aching butt as he did.

Mark was lying down close to Jisung, he had both palms pressed against his own head, “Ah oww Jisung? Why were you—oh, ow call Haechan please I need to tell him something. Your hair is blue.” Mark got up only to have his legs dramatically crumple underneath him.

“Mark… Are you—”

“I’m not okay, I think I’m dying. You were running so fast, how are you okay? You should be dying too… But I’m glad you’re not. Did you call him?”

“Haechan knows my hair is blue.”

“That’s not what I need to tell him.”

“Mark come on get up, the café is close by you should sit or lie down.”

“My head hurts.”

“I’ll only call Haechan if you get up.”

“Okay.” Mark lifted a hand for Jisung to take and hoist him up, which he did.

The café was really close, Jisung realized. In a few minutes he and Mark were sitting together in the empty staff room.

He called Haechan, like he’d promised, once Mark was sitting with his back resting against the wall.

“Hello?” Mark said too loudly. “Ow.”

Jisung kept the phone on speaker in case he needed to jump in and explain what happened to Haechan.

“Mark? Why do you have Jisung’s phone? Is he not at school?”

“Haechan listen.” Mark said heavily, like he was drunk. “It wasn’t his fault, but I want you to know… you need to know.”

“What? You sound awful. Where are you? Tell me where you are, I’ll come to you.”

“You need to know,” Mark continued, wincing in pain. “How amazing you are. You’re so so gorgeous I can’t stop thinking about your pretty pretty jokes.”

“My pretty jokes? Is Jisung with you? If he is give him the phone.”

“Your brain is like a—like a… like something that’s precious and rare and—”

Jisung took the phone, “He hit his head. I wasn’t looking and I literally ran right into him. I think he has a concussion.”

“Where are you?”

“At the café.”

“Don’t tell him where we are, I don’t want him to see me like this.” Mark said with his eyes half closed.

“Why aren’t you at a hospital?” Haechan demanded.

“The café was closer.” Jisung reasoned.

“I’m on my way.” Haechan hung up after an impatient sigh.

It was a bit awkward after that, Jisung tried to kill some of the awkwardness he felt by looking up symptoms of trauma to the head on his phone.

It was only a matter of minutes until Haechan arrived.

“I’ll take it from here,” Haechan said after a few seconds of cooing and fussing over a pouty half-conscious Mark. “Go to school.”

“Fine.” Jisung said.

 

Jisung got detention. He didn’t care.

They were also going to call his mother to inform her. He doubted she would pick up the phone at this point.

He actually tried to pay attention in literature class, but the poems they were analyzing seemed to be personally criticizing him. He didn’t need any didactic bullshit right now, it was too late for it. So he decided to use his selective hearing ability to protect himself.

Classes went by a lot faster after that. He even managed to fail a quiz without trying. He made a mental note to brag about it to Haechan later.

At lunch he found that the people who had his ‘shift’ today were Jeno and Renjun.

He stopped them before they brought up what he’d said earlier and made them promise to stick to topics that did not include his fight with Chenle.

 

When Jisung came home, he found Mark lying down in the living room eating some kind of broth, the only indication of his brother being in the house.

He went over to sniff it, wrinkled his nose then went up to his room.

He lifted the blinds and watched orange rays spill into his room.

He wondered what Chenle was up to.

His computer stared at him menacingly. He hadn’t touched it since Mark’s party.

He decided to start working on his art project.

After a few hours of cutting and gluing, a knock sounded at the door.

“Come in.” He said distractedly.

It was Mark. “Hey, Jisung. What are you making?”

“A replica.” Jisung answered simply. Working on it had eased his mind, he credited the peace he felt to the repeated actions of cutting one piece of cardboard after another and seeing something begin to assemble right before his eyes. In a way, it was kind of like coding.

He posed next to the shapeless heap in his hands and smiled at Mark, “Does it look like me?”

Mark clucked out a laugh, “Exactly.” He said, speaking to the pile of cardboard as though it was Jisung.

Jisung shook his head, breathing out a short laugh.

Mark came to sit next to him on the floor. He watched him work in silence for a while before asking if he could play some music. Jisung nodded his assent.

After a few songs, Mark asked, “Is it supposed to be a computer from the Stone Age?”

“Pretty much, yeah. That’s good, that you could already tell.” Jisung felt a wave of pride wash through him.

Mark cleared his throat in away that made Jisung tense in preparation for what was to come.

“Haechan’s worried about you.” He said.

“He shouldn’t be.”

“Really?” Mark asked.

Jisung just stared at him in response.

When Mark didn’t say anything Jisung spoke, “You can’t know what it’s like for me right now.”

Mark was quiet for some time.

“You feel,” Mark said. “Like your skin is covered in thorns, you feel like you’re poison.”

Jisung fixed his gaze at a small section of the carpet under his folded legs.

“You feel alone.” Mark said. “But you’re not.” He put his hands on his shoulders and repeated, “You’re not alone, Jisung. Haechan loves you, Jaemin, Jeno, Renjun, Chenle—even if he’s mad at you right now, he still loves you. And I love you.”

A rogue tear slid down his cheek. It barely made it down the middle of his face before Mark wiped it and took him into his arms.

When Jisung was sure he would die from lack of oxygen, he coughed and Mark loosened his hold to look him in the eye.

Jisung said, “Wow, Mark. I had no idea you felt this way… Haechan’s going to be heartbroken…”

He cackled when a smile cut through Mark’s face and he shoved Jisung away.

They talked while Jisung worked, Mark only helping by handing him whatever he needed.

Mark explained to Jisung that he needed to forgive himself first, not forgetting to mention that he was aware that this was easier said than done, but that it wasn’t by any means an impossible task.

Jisung remembered Chenle giving Mark that advice a few months ago.

Haechan joined them when he came back home.

“You know, Jisung, when I suggested you get a make over, I was thinking something that would make you look better…”

Mark had to break them apart before one of them got injured.

When Jisung went to bed that night, he felt better than he had in weeks. He felt warm, safe, and most importantly, he felt hopeful.

 

The weekend passed quickly. Jisung promised Haechan he was fine and that he and Mark could go back to the dorms now.

Haechan had agreed on the condition that Jisung called him once a day to prove that he was in fact doing okay.

Jisung was excited for school.

He wanted Chenle to notice him so he decided to wear something bright. It was only after he put on the orange hoodie that he remembered how bright his hair was now.

But he figured it was for the best.

He didn’t see him before his first class, but they had Problems and Solutions together soon.

“Nice hair,” someone behind him said, not bothering to hide their laughter.

“Thanks.” He answered genuinely, turning around to smile at the guy who blushed in embarrassment. It seemed he hadn’t expected Jisung to actually reply.

Jisung couldn’t contain his excitement; he’d never been more ready to apologize to someone.

Chenle would forgive him, he had to believe that in order to stay brave. And it didn’t matter if he was in love with him and Chenle didn’t feel the same. Nothing was worse than losing his best friend.

Hell, if Chenle forgave him, he would do anything he could to make Chenle happy, including helping him talk to the new girl he likes.

The bell rang and Jisung jumped up quickly. His teacher gave him a strange look, to which he only smiled. He saw Jaemin in the hallway.

“I’m on Jisung duty today!” Jaemin cooed, pinching Jisung’s cheek. “Though it hardly feels like work when it’s you.”

“That won’t be necessary. We’re all sitting together today.” Jisung announced.

Jisung didn’t catch his reaction because Chenle was walking with Renjun and Jeno not too far ahead of him.

He grabbed Jaemin’s hand and sped up, focusing on the green hood of Chenle’s white pullover. “Come on.”

“Hey guys!” Jisung said cheerfully.

Jeno let out a sound of surprise and Renjun elbowed him. “Hi,” Renjun said.

Chenle didn’t look like he missed any of it. However, he didn’t acknowledge Jisung at all.

“Hi, Chenle,” Jisung said. His voice betrayed some emotion, but he didn’t mind. This wasn’t a time for him to be concerned about his pride. Too much was on the line.

He watched color race up the back of Chenle’s neck and tinge his ears bright red.

He supposed that, even if it came from anger, was better than no reaction at all.

“Hello,” Jeno said. Jisung wanted to show his gratitude, but he just narrowed his eyes at Jeno instead.

Jisung clutched his blue notebook nervously as they entered the classroom.

He deliberately slowed down to see where Chenle would sit. He sat in the middle row and towards the right. Jisung took the empty seat to his left.

They were about a meter apart and Jisung wished they were alone.

Their teacher seemed to have regained his spirit as he entered the classroom with a flourish.

“Psst,” Jisung whispered to Chenle. “I want to talk to you.”

“Hello everyone! I believe I asked you to prepare something for this class?”

Some groans was the only response he received.

“Hey!” Jisung whispered louder. Chenle gave him a silencing look, the corners of his mouth drawn downward.

Jisung could feel the excitement coming from Jaemin behind him. The teacher asked if someone wanted to volunteer to go first. He didn’t have time to finish his sentence before Jaemin got up, “I would love to!” Jaemin said.

Chenle was biting his nails. In his other hand, he was folding and unfolding a crumpled paper absentmindedly.

“Oh, yes,” The teacher beamed. “I remember you, Na Jaemin, correct?” Jaemin nodded. “Why don’t we give someone else a chance to speak today?”

Jaemin’s expression fell as he sat back down.

“How about you?” The teacher asked someone. Jisung couldn’t see who it was because he was still staring at Chenle. At that moment, Chenle turned to look at him expectantly. His eyes narrowed and then Jisung realized that the entire class was looking at him.

“Oh,” He said. “I have something, yes.”

He stood up and the teacher ushered him to the front of the class.

“What is your problem today?” Their teacher said in a way that showed just how many times he had practiced it.

Jisung’s eyes met Chenle’s and he could have sworn that for half a second, he caught humor at the same thought reflected there.

“I want to talk to you.” Jisung said in a clear voice.

“Excuse me?” The teacher said.

Chenle’s mouth dropped open.

“Chenle,” Jisung said. “I really need to talk to Chenle, but he won’t let me.”

“Oh!” The teacher exclaimed. “That’s good, who is Chenle?”

Chenle was shaking his head at Jisung. From his seat he spoke up, “I’m Chenle.”

“Will you let me explain?” Jisung asked. His heart was in his throat.

“No.” Chenle said coldly.

“My problem is Jaemin.” Renjun said loudly, quickly getting up and taking Jisung’s place. He gently touched Jisung’s back as he did so. “Jaemin can be so—”

Jisung’s ears were pounding as he walked back to his seat. He couldn’t really bring himself to look at Chenle. After a few beats, he raised his head to find Jaemin looking at him, his eyes brimming with concern.

He clenched and unclenched his jaw to distract himself from the pity around him.

Something hit the side of his head.

His hand came up to touch his temple, then he noticed the paper airplane on his desk.

When he looked at Chenle, he found the other boy staring at the student who was presenting their problem at the moment.

He smoothed the airplane to its original form.

Meet me after school.

He sighed his relief. After a brief moment of private celebration, he went back to paying attention.

Renjun was standing by his desk, “Jaemin destroyed my oven. Now _that_ is a real problem!” He yelled at the student in front of the board.

“It’s not like I was the only one using it. You know, I could argue that it was _your_ oven that destroyed my cake!”

“Look, I have a real concern, unlike some people who wrote a whole dissertation about the most mundane and harmless of things.” Renjun shot back.

Jisung smiled.

 

They all sat together at lunch. Renjun and Jaemin had just made up and Jeno immediately picked a fight with Jaemin. Jisung was playing devil’s advocate to both parties and every time Chenle laughed, Jisung’s heart soared until he caught him cut his laughter short, quickly focusng on his phone with an annoyed expression on his face. Then Jisung’s heart would drop until he reminded himself that he would be able to apologize properly after school.

Chenle left a few minutes before lunch period ended. Jisung suspected it was because he didn’t want to walk with him to art class, which was fair.

When he was right outside the class, he noticed Chenle sitting next to a bunch of students Jisung didn’t know. He was talking to them animatedly, describing something with his hands flying out in the air.

Jisung took a deep breath, readying himself to enter the class and sit alone.

His phone vibrated in his pocket before he walked in. He had hardly touched it all day. For a dazed moment, he wondered if he had accidentally turned on the vibration feature.

Then panic seized him. There was one reason for which Jisung had set his phone to vibrate.

His eyes widened. He was frozen by the threshold.

The feeling left his hands first, then the numbness traveled upwards until his face was tingling.

His breath was coming up shallow.

He took one more look at Chenle, who was laughing hard with another student.

Chenle must have felt Jisung’s stare.

It was like everything was moving in slow-motion and Jisung alone was in real time.

He turned away before Chenle could see him and ran faster than he’d ever run before.

The first thing he did was to check on his computer. If the alarm he’d received wasn’t false, there would be…

There it was—Someone had installed a RAT.

For the very first time in his life, Jisung has been hacked.

He didn’t have time. He needed to run, quickly.

He grabbed a duffel bag and stuffed it with whatever he thought he might need while he was on the run. He pulled a black beanie over his head and put the glasses Chenle had bought him safely between his clothes. He realized he was crying and didn’t bother to wipe any of the tears.

He was about to leave his entire life behind.

Someone was coming up the stairs.

His mind was reeling.

He needed to get out quickly.

Haechan was safe because he technically didn’t know anything about the crimes Jisung and Chenle had committed. He’d made sure to omit Chenle from anything remotely incriminating so all he needed to do now was—

He ran towards the window, the footsteps were drawing nearer.

He could make the jump—

“Jisung?” He turned so quickly he almost lost his balance. It was Chenle. “What are you—”

Jisung cut him off, “Listen to me,” He walked up to his friend and grabbed his shoulders, shaking him once. “I’ve been hacked, they probably know about everything. You’re going to be fine, I promise. All you need to do is pretend that you didn’t know that what I was doing was real. Tell them that you thought we were playing, that I told you it was a game. It’ll work. I’ll release some stuff about myself that will make me look really bad and make you look like a victim. It’ll suck for you for a while, but eventually it will die down and people will move on to other things.”

Chenle looked stunned, the color drained completely from his face. “Jisung—” He whispered a hand coming up to touch Jisung’s wet cheek.

“I’m so sorry Chenle, I was a crap friend and I lost your trust and it was the worst thing I’ve ever done and I’ll always regret it.” Jisung couldn’t resist leaning close and hugging Chenle. It would be the last time he saw the other boy and he decided not to have any more regrets, “I want you to know that I love you.” He said. “And that I’m sorry about this, too.”

It was as easy as breathing when he took Chenle’s face in his hands and pressed their lips together. His heart broke when he leaned away a second later.

“Go back home. Pretend you don’t know anything.” Jisung instructed as he slung the bag over the shoulder.

“Jisung.” Chenle said.

When Jisung turned around, Chenle unslung the bag from his shoulder and threw it down on the carpet between them. “I’m the one who hacked you.” Chenle said. Jisung couldn’t understand, “What?”

“Um,” Chenle bounced from one foot to the other. “I’m the one who hacked you so you can relax.”

Jisung didn’t know what to think or say. He didn’t know how long he stayed silent until Chenle let out a sound of frustration and demanded, “Say something!”

“You…” Was all Jisung could manage.

“Look, I’m sorry. I didn’t really think it through. I just kept thinking that this was the only way for us to be even, you know, and get back to normal.”

That made sense, Jisung supposed. “How?” He asked.

Chenle smirked, “What, you think I’ve been sitting with you all these years without picking up anything? Besides, I’ve seen you build your shields, so you could say I had the cheat sheet to tearing them down.”

Jisung was… embarrassed. He had confessed to Chenle, he had _kissed_ him fully knowing that his best friend liked someone else. It had been so easy when he thought he would never see him again.

“So… Now we’re even.” Chenle said again.

Jisung was staring at the floor. He willed it to open up and take him away.

“I’ll get you some water, sit down.” Chenle touched his arm before turning to go down to the kitchen.

“Wait.” Jisung said. “I don’t want water.”

“Oh, okay.”

“You—What I said… I meant it. But I know you like someone else and I don’t mind. I’m sorry that I made things awkward and weird.”

Chenle’s hand flew up to cover his lips.

Jisung thought about how his own lips were still tingling.

When Chenle lowered his hand, Jisung saw that where he had expected Chenle to be disgusted, his friend was smiling.

“Sit down.” Chenle said.

They both sat cross-legged by the bed, “What you saw, the texts with Taeyong, they were about you.” Chenle said.

“But you were talking about a girl.” Jisung’s breath caught. He couldn’t believe what he was hearing.

“Yeah, if I said it was a guy, he might have guessed it was you.”

“Oh,” Jisung said, his face warmed. “But you said you were dating Alice…”

“Yes,” Chenle said. “Six months ago. I dated her for about three weeks and then we ended it.”

“You never said anything.”

Chenle remained silent.

At Jisung’s expression he sighed and explained, “She asked me out, I thought she was cute so I said yes. I kissed her after the second date and it was nice,” He paused when Jisung winced but then continued. “After a few weeks, I didn’t want to keep kissing her anymore so I told her that I wanted to end it. And I didn’t tell you because I was afraid.”

“What were you afraid of?”

“That you might notice that I… you know.”

Jisung’s head was spinning. “You were still hanging out with her months after that.”

“Yes, we became friends.”

“You like girls.” Jisung accused.

“Yes and I also like boys.” Chenle reasoned.

“Oh.”

“Yeah.”

“Okay.” Jisung said and Chenle smiled.

Chenle reached forward and took Jisung’s hand in his. He intertwined their fingers then used his thumb to stroke the back of Jisung’s hand.

Something stirred in Jisung’s chest and he resisted the urge to pull his hand away. Instead he smiled down at their hands until Chenle said, “There’s one more thing.”

When Jisung squinted at him in confusion he said, “What I said about you not being normal. I made it sound like a bad thing, but I was angry and I didn’t mean it. You’re not normal, that’s true. But it’s because you’re better than normal, you’re more. You’re—”

“I get it.” Jisung said pushing lightly at Chenle’s shoulder and turning his face away to hide the deepening blush on his face.

Chenle breathed out through his nose, “Hey,” He said and Jisung looked at him. “When I told you to reveal your secret, it’s because I think you’re amazing.”

“I think you’re amazing, too.” Jisung said. He wasn’t sure what else to say. “So, we like each other… Now what?” Jisung asked.

Chenle laughed mischievously, “If I remember correctly, you said you _loved_ me.”

“Agh,” Jisung tried to get away but Chenle was a step ahead of him.

“I love you, too, Jisung.” Chenle said.

This was too much for Jisung, his ears were burning and he was sure he looked like a tomato.

“And to answer your question, we could watch a movie, catch a criminal, or we could kiss without you thinking you had to run away for the rest of your life. Up to you.” Chenle leaned back, supporting his weight on his palms which were pressed to the carpet.

Jisung pretended to think about it for a while before saying, “Let’s watch a movie.”

As soon as Chenle leaned forward on his knees to smack Jisung’s arm, Jisung pressed his palm to his cheek and Chenle paused with narrowed eyes, looking down at Jisung.

Jisung smiled, a buzz of happiness was spreading through his chest.

He remembered the volcano.

Jisung traced Chenle’s jaw with his fingers and braced his other hand on Chenle’s arm.

Chenle took the hand that was on his arm and intertwined their fingers again before putting his other hand on the back of Jisung’s neck and slipping his fingers through the soft hairs at Jisung’s nape.

“I never got a chance to say this,” Chenle said. “I really like your hair.”

Jisung laughed.

The past week had turned Jisung’s heart into a mess and the thought that Chenle loved him was a soothing balm to his aching chest.

Chenle’s lips touched his.

Jisung rose to his knees. He moved his mouth slowly, almost experimentally against Chenle’s.

He wasn’t sure if he was doing it right.

Chenle must have felt his concern because he started playing with his hair. Jisung relaxed and focused only on the way Chenle’s lips moved against his own.

His heart felt close to exploding when Chenle broke the kiss to smile at him. Jisung blinked at him, still dazed.

He was surprised when Chenle kissed his nose, but it did break him out of whatever spell he was under and he managed a smile.

“Let’s watch that movie now.” Chenle said, stretching his arms above his head cheerfully.

“I’ll order the pizza.” Jisung replied.

 

Chenle and Jisung were lying down on their stomachs on the bed.

Halfway through the movie, Jisung paused it.

Chenle’s hand, which had been stroking Jisung’s hair, stilled.

Jisung told Chenle that he’d been thinking about releasing his video game to the world for a while now.

“So why don’t you?” Chenle asked, there was only genuine curiosity in his tone.

“I like going to school with you.” Jisung admitted. “And I’m afraid of change.”

“We’ll still be the same. I promise. And the change will be good.” Jisung smiled at Chenle before squeezing his nose once.

“You’re really smart.”

“I know.” Chenle agreed.

 

Jisung decided that he wanted to hand in his art assignment before leaving this school behind for good.

He did that mainly because Chenle refused to show him the painting Renjun had helped him with. All he knew was that it was something abstract.

Haechan and Mark agreed to help Jisung haul his homework to the classroom since they didn’t have any morning classes that day.

Haechan winked at Jisung before leaving. He was excited to hear about Jisung’s decision to release the video game, which made him the most famous teenager, at least for the time being. He was given scholarships and had accepted one which would take him to another high school. He knew nothing about it except that it was fancy and for the extremely gifted. Out of all his options, it seemed like the most normal and sane one available to him.

Class started and students were handing in their works.

Jisung had recreated a computer, but he’d given it a cartoon heart and a crack through the screen. The rising smoke had been a bit trickier to accomplish, but he’d managed it with Haechan and Mark’s help.

Some of the students found Jisung’s computer rendition to be cute, most students found it confusing.

Chenle came closer to him to whisper, “You’re never useless.” In his ear.

Chenle’s project got the biggest reaction.

It was beautiful, bright, but not in an overpowering way that made you want to shield yourself from it.

It was warm and encompassing in a comforting way.

“Wow,” Jisung breathed.

“Renjun did it, I just described it to him.”

“What word did you submit?” Jisung already suspected something.

“Friend.” Chenle said, smiling and taking Jisung’s hand in his.

Jisung felt overwhelmed.

He made a mental note to steal the painting before leaving the classroom and this part of his life behind.


	6. Epilogue

Jisung was getting ready for his first day of school.

He was nervous, but excited.

He didn’t know whether he would make any friends, but it didn’t matter because he already had friends.

He was, however, excited to learn something for a change.

He had to take a bus to the school. He would miss walking… and the pigeons.

He checked his phone.

He had a text from his brother:

Don’t be nervous and have fun with other smart people!

Yuta is next to me so I can’t relate askdkshjshfkasJKHGASGKjhJKHSDsk

(Received 7:30 AM)

He assumed his brother had risked his life to successfully send the text.

It was touching.

He decided to text Chenle:

Hey

(Sent 7:31 AM)

He ignored the slight disappointment he felt when the bus stopped 15 minutes later and he still hadn’t gotten a text back.

 

The school was huge. It had an alien futuristic feel to the way it was structured, which made Jisung forget about how nervous he was. His entire body was thrumming with excitement.

He asked a student about where to find his locker, showing her the number he was given. She pointed to a pair of twisty escalators on their right.

He went up the escalator. His fingers danced along the band.

There was a student shoving his books into a locker right next to the one assigned to Jisung.

Jisung’s breath caught.

He had to be imagining this.

Chenle turned around and flashed Jisung a bright smile. “Hi.” He said. “Can you believe they held me back a grade?” He faked a pout.

“W-what are you doing here?” Jisung stammered.

“I go here.” Chenle explained. “This _is_ a school for geniuses… and it accepts reasonably smart students who paid for the new library.” Chenle shut his locker. “I called the library Chenji, by the way. It’s a good way to test the name for when we start our company after we graduate…” Chenle said thoughtfully.

“Wait, you’re going here? _And_ they held you back a grade?” Jisung couldn’t contain his excitement. He was smiling so widely his cheeks hurt. “That’s perfect!” Jisung said hugging Chenle hard.

He heard Chenle grunt from the impact, and then he wrapped his arms around Jisung.

Something clicked when Chenle nuzzled his face into Jisung’s neck.

“Why Chenji? Jichen sounds better.” Jisung teased, slipping out of Chenle’s arms.

“Shhhh,” Jisung smiled when Chenle silenced him with a kiss.

As soon as they broke apart, Jisung repeated, “Seriously, though Jichen is so much better than—”

“Just ask for another kiss if that’s what you want.” Chenle interrupted him.

The way he blushed was enough of a confession for Chenle, who pressed his lips to Jisung’s one more time.

 

 

**Author's Note:**

> My [twt](https://twitter.com/Spaceship0Mile)
> 
> My [cc](https://curiouscat.me/Spaceship0Mile)


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